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I wouldn't leave. I'm not going to say this is normal, I'd say it's more taboo. Relationships take work from both sides and when life and paying the bills are prioritised, we tend to take each other for granted because they will always be there, right? So they get put on the back burner. When something is lacking from a long term relationship then some of us tend to seek it elsewhere, I'm not talking cheating, I'm talking attention and crushes. I've felt them before myself. I've only ever looked at the danger zone though…. never stepped through it. So he definitely did the wrong thing but you still have a chance to turn things around.
He should of woke up and got worried about the feelings he was having and come straight to you.
If I were you, I'd spend the next 3-6 months of intense relationship work. Up your date nights, up your communication, prioritise your relationship, focus on intimacy and sex. If by the end of that time you still feel differently with him then you need to reevaluate your relationship.
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Okay I havent seen this anywhere so idk if it's just people inexperienced with your situation or not, but I think this stress is eating at him and probably you too.
Some people get divorced over a renovation to the house let alone moving to a new town and starting a new job.
None of this excuses what he said however, I'm curious as to the transcript of what you BOTH said and did.
He might be so stressed out that hes done with life so to speak and not just your marriage. And then walking into a house without electricity that was, what I assume your responsibility by how you wrote it, probably set him over the edge.
The guy probably needs some counseling or a hobby that doesnt stress him out. He might just need a break, idk. But to me, that sounds like his mental health is spiraling.
very true. anyway you slice it, the bf is an asshole. i 100% wanting reassurance but the way he went about it shows a massive lack of trust and respect for OP. that's the core issue imo.
i had to scroll back up to confirm the ages lmao. this sounded like you were both in your 20's ? if she's stupid enough to cut you off because you wouldnt break a no contact order that SHE refuses to drop, shouldn't that be a sign???
You have 2 choices.
A. Accept it, agree to wait, then RESPECT her choice, no boundary pushing, no convincing, no cheating, nothing but acceptance and patience; or
B. Break up.
That's it. Those are your choices. There's no option C, no matter what crafty idea you come up with.
To move to another state, you'll need at least enough for a deposit and two months rent, plus enough for groceries and other expenses.
When you move states, you will not be able to deposit checks for at least a couple of weeks, and depending on the bank (at least in the US), up to 15 business days, if I remember correctly (it's been a few years since I've done this, so bear with me). Depending on when you move into a place, you could end up having rent due during that time, and so you need enough to cover that, plus your groceries, transportation, etc. Plus, you'll need to get a new ID, and tags for a car, if you have one, and depending on the state, you may have to pay additional taxes. You'll need enough for possible deposits on utilities, depending on your credit history. If you have any past due balances on any utilities, you will need to pay those before they will switch them over to a new place. You'll need to change your mailing address, and keep in mind that when you do this through the post office live, I'm pretty sure they send you info to both the new and the old address, in case it was a mistake, so if you don't want your partner to know where you are, you'll need to take that into consideration.
Once you get to the new place, you'll need to budget for some cleaning supplies, and broom/mop/towels, etc, along with other essentials. You'll eventually need furniture, though that doesn't have to be immediate, though you will need someplace to sleep. You'll need hygiene products.
This is wild, are you serious? The answer is, you shouldn’t go on the trip. Your son is your first priority and you have no one to watch him. Three weeks a “boyfriend” hardly makes. Even if it’d been three months I’d say it’s too soon.
I've been through the same thing, except it was my ex-wife that put in >30%…
To me it sounds like he’s kind of controlling? I prefer smaller gatherings for birthday parties as well since I have social anxiety and hate being the center of attention even on my birthday. I don’t blame you for being upset and I think how he twisted your words was very wrong and ESPECIALLY bad mouthing you to his family while you were right there. If he can’t understand why you were upset then I wouldn’t waste my time with someone like him.
No worries
I’m sorry but she already cheating on you emotionally. The proof is there. It is inappropriate to call each other pet names and kissing emojis while in a relationship. Dealbreaker for me, I would end it.