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Marie and Tom, 22 y.o.
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Accidentally or not, confront her! Give her the ultimatum! Tell her what will happen when you find proof. Don't back down when she gaslights and starts acting like you're everything evil and the dramatic tears. Just keep asking, “are you done! Now confess!”
I’ll be honest, I’ve had the same reaction. Until realizing men don’t want to for a number of reasons, just like women! I’d probably get butthurt still, but try to be understanding
To me this is also a consent issue. Trying to have another kid should be a “two yes, one no” situation.
Babies and pregnancy put a lot of strain on a relationship (which isn’t to say that it can’t be strong and positive, but requires a lot more effort just to stay afloat) and it’s nude when both parents are pouring most of their effort into survival and the kids.
My wife had 2 over 3 years and it’s a coin flip as to whether her sleep is destroyed or not on any given day. I’m so glad we’re aligned on being done.
Let him book his own trip.
Maybe you could write him a handwritten letter expressing your deep apologies.
It’s just projection