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No, this is very much a her problem as much as it is an ex husband problem. People who are willing to cheat with those in relationships are trash and it doesn’t take saying a vow to make someone responsible for their behaviour to others – we all have done duty not to hurt people if we can avoid it.
To a lot of men “wife material” is translated to them as cook, maid and housekeeper. Any man who would tell you that you're not “wife material” is someone who has a bit of a disrespectful view of women.
Yes. But women are used to having clothes that are handled in special ways. Men’s clothes rarely have special washing instructions.
I’m not saying he can’t learn, I’m just saying she asking A Lot. She should make it easier or do it herself.
He said more than that. Don’t feel insecure. Through all of that, I heard “I love you. Please just love me”. That’s all ? you’re good.
Let me put it this way……
You are not more important to her than this guy. She is willing to risk your entire relationship for this guy. She cheated on you once with him and decided to resume contact knowing that if you found out it would be the end of your relationship and she still chose to do it. You’re still trying to protect her and she could careless about you. Again, in her mind, you are not more important to her than this guy.
And your first mistake was keeping her infidelity a secret and dealing with it alone. Second was taking her back. Third is caring more about her when she doesn’t even care about you.
It wasn’t a mistake, it was a choice. And she has never chosen you, just him.
Don’t listen this time and it will progressively get worse.
Only after I deleted the post did I get to see a couple of replies! Everything kept getting deleted. But thank you for at least validating what I’m feeling at this moment. It’s been so long, and the lack of effort has hurt to no end. He can see that I’m desperate for things to change. For any kind of acknowledgment. But he puts his wall up, and eventually I break and let it pass. It never truly does though. And all of the unresolved issues are coming back up. It feels like I’m blowing even the smallest things out of proportion, but it’s an accumulation of years of silence and no true accountability.
That’s a lot of nonsense build-up about how nice he is just to say he molested his sister. You are unhinged if you stay in this relationship. I would never speak to this man again, let alone marry him!
I’m also not concerned that she is going to cheat. The relationship is healthy
You don't need a valid reason to end a relationship. But even if you did, him being gross is absolutely a valid reason.
I would be very uncomfortable with a partner expecting me to be cordially be around someone who did that to my friend, especially so recently, and who maintained a friendship with the guy himself beyond what is absolutely necessary for work. I would even be more uncomfortable being around a bunch of men all okay with what he did.
I would either not go, or go with the caveat that I won’t promise not to make things awkward, just maybe to not start shit. Basically I’d be like “if he says or does something I find reprehensible or disrespectful about my friend or that crosses any sort of moral line, I may not be able to hold back.”
I’d also have a naked time not warning the new gf.