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Attraction is natural, it's how you deal with it that makes you into a better person. You can do this.
Is she by chance ADHD? That's not the answer to everything but if she got treatment it may help, not alot but it may explain her behavior. The thing is she has to want it. She doesn't feel threatened you will leave. Sometimes people dont know what they have until its gone.. i think you need to sort this out before even trying for another child. I am ADHD, had a little simular story. We ended up divorced but now we live across the street from each other co-parenting my daughter.
No, absolutely not. Any man who respects you and doesn’t feel disgustingly entitled to use your body for his own pleasure would never try to talk you out of using protection, or talk you into things you’re not ready for. You need to ditch this guy. He’s pushing these boundaries even when discussing it, which very much indicates that he’d be willing to violate your boundaries in the moment as well. He’s not a safe person to have sex with.