What you did was awful, and frankly, you son reaching out to you shows he is a great young man.
So you go. You listen. You don't do anything to defend yourself or your actions. You apologize if given the chance. You acknowledge the hurt you caused your son for choosing someone else over him. You do NOT justify it. You listen and give him what he needs: whatever it is that he needs. If he is open to fixing your relationship, you do it on his terms. This is not about you. This is not about Max. This is not about your daughter. This is about the son you abandoned, and being selfless enough to be whatever he needs from you right now.
He showed you his true colors once he got what he wanted. Don't waste your time and energy on a guy who can't be bothered to let you take a quick 5 minute shower after you were vulnerable and trusting with your body to him.
look: you are allowed to feel how you feel. It may be fashionable nowadays to blame all the ills of the world on White people but in truth, other races have comitted similar or greater evils. Genghis Khan, anyone? the Ottoman empire? I can go on.
but here's the deal: constantly harassing you over things you aree not personally responsible for is not what you want from someone you love. And it is also not something you do to someone you love.If this guy is only with you because he wnats to fele he has power over a maligned white perosn, that is racism as well.
YOU ARE NOT INFERIOR and regardless of whatever PC bullshit comes your way nobody gets to make you unhappy because perceived racial slights. If for him you are just “white girl i get to F and also harass” that is not love. Proceed acordingly
The first time my husband complained that I wasn't hanging his jeans correctly on the hangar was the LAST time I hung his jeans. We've been married 18 years and he hangs his jeans the way he likes.
The man has never once raised his voice to me or punched a thing.
GET OUT. As soon as you can make arrangements, GET OUT.
Care to explain how this is victim blaming? The guy is 100% unequivocally wrong for assaulting her. At what point did I blame OP?
That is an entirely separate discussion from her decision making. I'm not making an equivalence to her entering this situation -> she deserved what happened. If anything, you're the one doing that. I'm simply saying that this behavior of his didn't spring from nowhere. She even acknowledges as much, she literally says she ignored the red flags. What do you want to say? That OP herself has no clue what she's saying?
Oh oh! Wow. Shoe’s on the other foot. ??
like every other straight guy
Yeah, not every guy's socials are filled with IG models, most guys have actual interests.
The dumbells are over there, champ
What you did was awful, and frankly, you son reaching out to you shows he is a great young man.
So you go. You listen. You don't do anything to defend yourself or your actions. You apologize if given the chance. You acknowledge the hurt you caused your son for choosing someone else over him. You do NOT justify it. You listen and give him what he needs: whatever it is that he needs. If he is open to fixing your relationship, you do it on his terms. This is not about you. This is not about Max. This is not about your daughter. This is about the son you abandoned, and being selfless enough to be whatever he needs from you right now.
He showed you his true colors once he got what he wanted. Don't waste your time and energy on a guy who can't be bothered to let you take a quick 5 minute shower after you were vulnerable and trusting with your body to him.
Only if you dont use protection, which they did so no?
look: you are allowed to feel how you feel. It may be fashionable nowadays to blame all the ills of the world on White people but in truth, other races have comitted similar or greater evils. Genghis Khan, anyone? the Ottoman empire? I can go on.
but here's the deal: constantly harassing you over things you aree not personally responsible for is not what you want from someone you love. And it is also not something you do to someone you love.If this guy is only with you because he wnats to fele he has power over a maligned white perosn, that is racism as well.
YOU ARE NOT INFERIOR and regardless of whatever PC bullshit comes your way nobody gets to make you unhappy because perceived racial slights. If for him you are just “white girl i get to F and also harass” that is not love. Proceed acordingly
The first time my husband complained that I wasn't hanging his jeans correctly on the hangar was the LAST time I hung his jeans. We've been married 18 years and he hangs his jeans the way he likes.
The man has never once raised his voice to me or punched a thing.
GET OUT. As soon as you can make arrangements, GET OUT.
Care to explain how this is victim blaming? The guy is 100% unequivocally wrong for assaulting her. At what point did I blame OP?
That is an entirely separate discussion from her decision making. I'm not making an equivalence to her entering this situation -> she deserved what happened. If anything, you're the one doing that. I'm simply saying that this behavior of his didn't spring from nowhere. She even acknowledges as much, she literally says she ignored the red flags. What do you want to say? That OP herself has no clue what she's saying?