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Model from: br
Languages: pt,en,es
Birth Date: 1996-12-06
Body Type: bodyTypeAthletic
Ethnicity: ethnicityLatino
Hair color: hairColorBlack
Eyes color: eyeColorBlack
Subculture: subcultureRomantic
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“Ex-friend, your selfishness has irreversibly broken our friendship and any trust I could keep with you. You chose what you wanted over the respect of not just any marriage, but my marriage. Consider this to be the last point of communication with both me and my husband, as we both feel any future attempt at communication by you will be harassment.”
Don't make it emotional or petty, just straight to the point. She's clearly got some issues.
My dude…. I've been there, and I can whole-heartedly tell you it sucks no matter what you do.
In my early 20's, shortly after my entire family (myself, younger brother, mom, and father) moved from NJ to FL under the premise that my father wanted to be “closer to his mom and dad during their Autumn years”. Ok, I can kinda get behind that, right?
A few years after moving, my father started having an affair with a woman from Missouri. It started all online, but eventually became an IRL thing and wasn't discovered until AFTER we hosted this woman's entire family for a week or two as a “vacation” for them AT OUR FUCKING HOUSE.
Shortly after they left, a series of events occured that I'm not going to get into now (I could write a TV sitcom about my life, for real…), but at some point I was on my computer (which the family used as well, but it was mine) and dear-old-dad left his email open. I am not usually one to pry, but when the top email is literally a payment confirmation for a set of dildos and anal beads for someone not named “”, it made me curious…
I confronted my father about this. His response was….. less than remorseful. He stated that he “didn't love anymore” and that he had fallen out of love with her a while ago among other things.
I can't remember how it finally got to my mom… She, obviously, was heartbroken at the time. I had moved out and started living with my gf at the time (now my wife of almost 10 years and mother of our 8yo son), so when I got the phone call that he was finally divorcing my mom, and that it was MY FAULT that this all came to light, and the whole “I hope you're happy with yourself” guilt-trip attempt (I'm sorry? What?), it didn't phase me at all.
Obviously I was more concerned about my mom, but I knew she could handle herself — my mom is a strong-willed woman – growing up, she named her fists “death” and “mame” and she was never afraid to defend herself (different story, different time….). Needless to say, he and I did not have a very amicable relationship in the end… He intentionally painted me as the black sheep of the family in every way he could.
Eventually, asshole father moved out and (no surprise) shacked right up with this other woman… They wound up moving to (of all places) a nudist resort and buying a plot there, buying new vehicles, spending money he straight up did not have… How could they afford this? My father was permanently disabled and hadn't worked a day since I was 7??? The fuck? I ask for a fucking Xbox and you tell me we can't afford it but you'll dump 80k CASH for a Dodge Ram 3500 turbo diesel????? Sigh… Whatever…
One evening, I get a call from my brother… Father is dead. Dead at the nudist resort… Ooof… Okay. Sorry, not sorry, I guess? Turns out he had a massive heart attack right after having sex with his mistress/new wife.
It wasn't until after he died that the truth about many things came out.
I come from a family of money… Not huge amounts, but there's a couple million that's old money. This is important and not some dick-measuring contest….
Turns out my father was defrauding my grandmother of TONS of money. That's how he could afford all these things. He has himself placed into all her accounts after my grandfather died. He actively just took what he wanted. Hundreds of thousands of dollars…. And fuck-all to show for it. 80k truck? Grandmom paid. Modular home at nudist resort? Grandmom paid. New computers/Laptops/Cell phone? $125k business venture where HE BOUGHT A FUCKING BIG RIG TO TRANSPORT CARS AND NEVER GOT A SIGNED WRITTEN CONTRACT WITH HIS “BUSINESS PARTNER”…. You guessed it… Grandmom paid.
He wrote a bullshit Last Will trying to give things away that weren't even his (trying to give away part of his inheritance, to be willed to him, from his still-living mom… Tools and property that weren't his…. I think you get what I'm saying.) He despised me enough in the end that he wrote me a separate letter in his Will effectively attempting to leave me a literal Nickel ($0.05 for you non-US readers).
In the end, my brother and I worked very naked for many years cleaning up his mess. Selling properties and vehicles he fraudulently bought. Can't even tell you how many credit cards we discovered were opened in other people's names. He attempted to get a CC in my nieces name even… He tried asking for my son's SSN “to start a college fund”, but I never gave it to him, thank god. That $125k “business venture”… Poof… All gone…
My relationship with my remaining family has improved significantly. I am no longer the black sheep as everyone realized my father was an asshole and lied about everything. My grandmother has full-blown terminal dimentia and now lives full-time with my mother. My mother, though stressed out, is doing well… She is fully retired, but has yet to really enjoy herself or her retirement since she is taking care of my father's mom, but she has always loved her like a 2nd mother. My brother and I do what we can to help her out wherever she needs it and we are as good as we can hope for, all things considered.
I am now 44. My Mom just turned 70. My grandmother is 91…
The moral of the story: Shits gonna happen that you can't control. You can't help what other people do… Sometimes all you CAN do is care about the people you love and hope for the best.
Be well, my dude…. You can hmu if you need someone to talk to.
I think your gut was right
This sucks, but be glad you found this out about her now, at 25, and not 10 years down the road.
Hold your head high– she is the one that carries the shame here. And don't take her back when this fly-by-night relationship of hers ultimately fails.
It sucks now, but you'll get through it. You're still very young. Happy Birthday, OP.
Ah yea sorry for misunderstanding. Very hot to glean intent behind text sometimes and it bites me in the ass. But I've genuinely had friends who (when we were younger) thought that was how hormonal birth control worked, or at least that it started to work right away instead of at least a month into taking it the same time every day. There are definitely a lot of people up in this comment thread that think that's how it works. OP definitely does.
I guess we'll see how things go when he comes home. He's been pretty silent about the whole thing. If he continues to deny it I'm more concerned he's hiding more or worse. That's the only thing I can come up with.
I would guess that his inability to get you pregnant played a part in his change of feelings. Men like that want you to be permanently anchored to them, even if they don't want to raise a child, they know that no matter what, you will be in their lives, needing something from them, forever.
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Run, girl.
3 in real life and idk how many in porn
the purpose of him stopping by was to tell us that our tv was too loud, which we respected and turned it down. and when confronted about the loud noises that have been happening since we moved in, he got very defensive. unfortunately the man that stopped by owns his condo, and we are only renting ours so our “landlord” can’t really do much so we are just confused on what to do.
Is this bait? Seems a little too obvious
The best advice you can get when dealing with men is that they don't respond to hints or signals. Just say outright what you want.
You need to communicate. Perhaps, if you're in a position to, consider couples just to have someone help you two do so and get to the root of the issues?
Maybe consider therapy for yourself if you can, just to have someone help you learn to stand up for yourself and improve your self-worth. It's always valuable having an objective, non-judgemental ear to talk you through your issues. Otherwise, do some research and look into some book and podcasts tackling self-esteem and self-help.
He could not realise it, which might be a stretch, he could also not realise how he's making you feel, which still sucks.
Communication is key. Maybe write down your feelings and get your head straight, write down what you would like to see from him, and potential solutions. Then sit him down and talk, don't allow interruption, tell him to wait until you're finished.
If he doesn't wait until you're finished, then tell him this kind of disrespect is a perfect example of what's wrong, and it's making you unhappy. Also make it clear the example he's setting for your kids. They'll think it's appropriate to disrespect you because of his constant undermining.
If it doesn't work out, that's okay too. It's okay to walk away. You need to do the best thing for yourself and your children.
Good luck, OP.
There's no mental gymnastics other than the one's you're creating. She told you she doesn't want to date you, and isn't romantically or sexually attracted to you.
She talks to you because you continue to do so. Why shouldn't she? You're available on command. That doesn't change the fact that you've explicitly been told it's not happening. Wake up my guy.
Story time, buddy.
I've been able to make my wife climax a handful of times in our 20 year relationship. She is a sexual Cassonova compared to how you describe your wife. Our sex is amazing other than that, but it weighs on me heavily and always has. I believe it is ultimately tied to religious shame, so I can only imagine how challenging your future is going to be in this department.
That said, it has gotten better over the years. Just wanted to point that out for reassurance; it can improve and with dedication I'm sure it will.
In all honesty, the way you have to think is for yourself. Over time, you may get more confident, assertive and 'manly'. But that has to come from you, if you try to act that way but it just isn't you then it will show in the end. As you will be living your life just to try to fit into what she is looking for rather than finding someone that loves you for how you are.
I appreciate that it is very difficult going through a break up, especially when it is not what you wanted. But take some time for yourself, find what makes you happy as an individual (not as part of a relationship) then all other things will fit into place. I hope you are doing okay as you can be in this situation.