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The fuck are you talking about? Being too large is literally brought up ever single instance of size matters discussions
I have not been keeping score. I just felt it pertinent to describe the events that put me into the frame of mind that continued throughout the rest of our relationship.
Is she okay with China's genocidal actions against the Uyghurs? Please tell her she sounds goofy and to stop spouting nonsense. If she stops talking garbage then she is dateable.
The thing is, there’s a difference between someone not being marriage material and someone not meeting your standards. Like how you said there’s no context we don’t know which one he’s referring to.
It’s not even a matter of him being right or wrong because it’s neither. Without the entire background he’s making a choice based on what’s best for his priority which is his wife. All he’s seeing is a younger woman who made a choice she wasn’t ready to make. She looks irresponsible and if that was the info I had I wouldn’t be inclined to hand a large sum of money over either.
Knowing it wasn’t a choice on the sisters part but a matter of safety his answer may be different. He can be neither right or wrong without the full context of the entire situation. And I’m not really getting why OP would want to hide it unless she herself has been active or enabling the abuse at home. Growing up in a similar situation where my brother was both sexually and physically abusive you don’t hide or avoid the topic unless your protecting the abuser. Op isn’t protecting her family image by doing this she’s denying and hiding and shifting fault onto the victim. It’s time to tell husband the truth and cut off abusive family members
Rip the bandaid off. Doing it in small pieces just prolongs the hurt.
Not exactly. He agreed that casual is cool. Since he doesn’t do long distance
“You need to find your own place and I'd appreciate it if you would be moved out by X date.” Give a date and stay firm.
You didn’t think that before. You said she probably shouldn’t and it would be “just a band aid.”
It's common knowledge. There are a lot of studies about it.
I have, and she will change her behavior as soon as I start putting pressure on her by not seeing her as often etc. But eventually she goes back to the same annoying patterns of behaviour
You can't know what she wants when she doesn't know herself. Wait, before you jump right back into that insanity. See what happens after some time.
You accepted the money transfer, right? Like I would have lead him on that you could maybe forgive him if he paid you back, and once you got your money then block the loser.
I used to shut down during arguments with my girlfriend.
I've struggled with Bipolar my entire life but have been stable for years now. I had a pretty traumatic upbringing while living with my overbearing, manipulating(also mentally ill) mother.
Due to all of these things, I never really learned conflict resolution. I did the same thing my mother did, ignored it, or ran away from it. Why? Well, it's all I knew, and it's the easy way out.
We did couples therapy and read a few books(hold me tight was helpful), and I started to analyze what was happening with pretty much every argument.
We would have a tiff about something REALLY small, I would brush it off because it's not something that would have bothered me. Brushing it off instead of just apologizing is when things turn bad. She would get upset, then I would be completely baffled, so I would walk away. We would both stew, and she would get more and more upset until things exploded.
I was the problem. I didn't realize the harm my silence was doing. I needed to get her to walk me through what she was feeling when we do the usual dance. Next, I had to learn how to handle conflict head-on. Still lots to figure out, but we are in a much better place.
Wow, this got long.
Tldr, maybe he doesn't know how to handle dealing with conflict, or doesn't understand how much it hurts you.
I have a pretty thick skull, so if I can figure this stuff out, anyone can.