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the issue is, he does self harm. I know he will harm himself if I leave, and It absolutely destroys me because it's the last thing I would ever want for him
The way you end it is to break contact. You have to do that, and until you do, this will drag on.
He doesn’t respect your autonomy if he’s insisting you have feelings that you don’t. If you do have those feelings but want to move on, the starting point is enforcing a boundary.
I guarantee it will be impossible to be successful with someone else when you’re still wrapped up in this guy’s life. Maybe you could be friends one day. But you’ve moved, and it sounds like you want to move on. Try being direct in one message or conversation, and then block him.
If you have no time to spend with her, you shouldn’t be with her. Its clear that quality time is important to her and you made it clear she is the lowest point of your priorities.
did u ever ask ur wife if she cared about him coming to live! with you for 4+ years? what was that conversation like? did she get an actual say in the matter or was it just a “i'm doing this and you have to be okay with it” situation? how much change did you have to make to accommodate the new child?
I don’t think you understand that part of therapy as a job is to provide therapy in a space where we can do the work
I fully understand I am a professional too. However that is just the ideal work environment, not the exclusive work environment. If you will only work in the ideal, how can you empathise with your patients?
I also did therapy during the pandemic and magically even with everyone on lockdown I never had this issue.
Are you a therapist? I know you claim to be, but therapists know of survivorship bias.
And yes it’s a rule we follow and we have ethical guidelines on this as well
Precisely it's only your practice's rule, the guideline proves there are therapists that go beyond the status quo. You wouldn't need a guieline, if everyone already followed it.