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My wife is asian and I'm white. Where my wife comes from, girls really are into white men. And some white men like myself, prefer Asian girls. I wouldn't say it's fetishizing, it's just a preference.
Sure-you can take this stance but don’t be surprised when the reaction you receive is what OP is dealing with. I’m about as progressive as they come but even I can understand that sometimes we make concessions for those we love. That isn’t a bad thing to do.
I gave my wife a meat thermometer one year for christmas. We always joked about how we purposefully overcook our meats because we were paranoid about serving something raw/undercooked, so it had at least a little thought behind it. When she opened it we had a good laugh and i think i've used it more than she has since then. Had you and your husband had any similar conversations about cooking that would have made this not so 'out of the blue'? And i would hope that even if he totally whiffed with the thermometer, that it wasn't the only thing he had gotten you for christmas. Were the other gifts he had gotten you equally silly or thoughtless, or was it just this one gift that really rubbed you wrong and you are now stuck on? Not all gifts will be bangers. As long as some of his other gifts were thoughtful and somethings you really wanted, i don't think it's a problem worth getting hung up on.
He said he doesn’t believe I genuinely like him now and I told him that I just want him
Confront her about it and stand up for yourself. Do not for a second believe that she does not know exactly what she is doing.
If you don't want to be treated like a child, stop acting like a child. When you live under your parent's roof, it's their rules. Time to move out.
Ok first off all, calling it “relations” is kind of weird. Secondly, she is a decade older than you. Find someone your own age.
I guess for her sake you should break up lol. Role playing is pretending, of course she LOGICALLY knows it’s you, but when you PRETEND you are not acknowledging logic in that moment, imagination you know? ??‍♀️
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My husband (37m) and I (35f) have been married since 2020. We dated 2 years before. He’s always been very open and honest with me to the best of my knowledge. He’s told me about some of his exes but not in great detail.
Yesterday he got a call from his brother, who lives a few towns over from the one my husband moved from before he moved here. His brothers girlfriend works at a daycare center. He was there picking her up when he saw one of my husbands exgirlfriend at the center, dropping off a young kid. My brother in law went over and began talking to her and she was somewhat evasive. But my BIL said it was unmistakable that the girl she was dropping off was the spitting image of my husband. And she was around kindergarten age, which means she was born right around the time my husband moved here and met me.
My husband reached out to this ex (Jess, 24f) who up until this point I didn’t know about except that they broke up before he moved here. She confirmed that the kid was his. And that she didn’t tell him about her because their breakup was rough and she said she didn’t want to contact him at all. She didn’t give any reasoning past that. My husband was understandably upset at this and I’m not entirely sure what his next move is going to be, after this conversation he went to bed and had left for work by the time I woke up this morning.
I don’t know how I feel about this or how to process this at all. I’ve always wanted kids but am unable to have them. My husband and I talked about adopting before but this isn’t something I think I know how to navigate. I looked up his ex on social media and the kid does look exactly like my husband, it’s unmistakable. It kind of makes me want to cry. I know this is all new and I need to process this but this is just something I never imagined I’d be dealing with.
edit I’m absolutely not trying to take this child from her mother I would never do that!!! edit 2 I was told I should add this in: I’m so incredibly disturbed and upset and nauseous by everything I’m finding out and realizing
It’s obviously not platonic.
This guy is not a friend to your marriage. No-contact.
He probably thinks you’re hotter & I can assure you he don’t give a shit about academic prestige. You’re probably right about it being irrational