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You don’t trust her because she parties a lot and you’ve seen things you weren’t comfortable with. You know what happens when someone parties a lot.
However she hasn’t done anything wrong that you know of while being with you. You’re just scared.
If she cheats, trust me you will find out. Stop waiting around for it and just appreciate what you have now. If her partying so much is affecting you, then it’s good to remember that it’s always girls out there that doesn’t party like she does.
Its momma bear time, but it would be better if you were single; do you really want your kids to have to see that or be victim to that? Protecting your kids is absolutely the hill to die on.
So I'm all for sex positivity. Current gf has shown interest in going to a strip club with me and maybe buying each other private dances (or doing a group one).
But sex positivity is a two way street. Both need to be happy and on board. Strip clubs are kind of depressing and gross and I also find it reasonable for a partner to not want you to go.
It's totally fine to think a lap dance is not okay in your marriage.
There’a a lot of people who can’t swim and they don’t face situation you’re talking about. Phobia is a different kind of fear that people can’t get over it easily.
There’s behavioral therapy that can help. Stop putting pressure on him it will not help at all and could even reinforce his fear.