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  1. Oh, maybe I ocervalued you in the other reply. You try to use logic to accuse thier faith, and still you commit logic fallacies.

    You're saying that ignoring the awful phrases of the book is irrelevant, but then you choose to ignore all the rest of the book which preaches compassion, charity and kindness for everyone, including the ones who don't follow the religion and go against its rules.

    Second logic fallacy: your comparing a book which is full of racist and violent ideology with a book which contains few awful bits.

    I don't understand you, there are just so many things you could criticize about christianity, yet you choose to purposedly depict the whole thing as awful basing on some phrases of the Ancient Testament, which are also in contradiction with newer bits of the bible.

    You know well they don't believe (sometiemes don't even know) the whole thing and still you feel the urge of make them guilt.

    You can't be eith a Christian? Don't date one. End of it.

    Other people can accept other people's beliefs and have no problem with it.

  2. You’re right. I just worry that he doesn’t have a lot of drive and ambition, which might lead to problems in the future if it doesn’t change.

    I could be self-sabotaging though, I never thought of it that way.

  3. No. And leave this man. He’s making you choose now after everything you went through. All the pain, all the excitement. No. All the money that went into this, no. There is no guarantee you’ll be able to get pregnant again. He had 9 years of you. He needs therapy or you need to leave him. He can’t base his father off of the one he’s gonna be. So therapy or leave him.

  4. You're a grown up, do as you please.

    The only thing I'd say re the age gap is understand what you each want out of the relationship.

    If he's 42 and single, he could either be committed to staying single, or could now be ready to settle down, and either could be fine with you, provided you KNOW the score.

    If it's the case that he wants permanency and you don't, you might want to be cautious, because he's getting to an age where he might be possessive and jealous if you aren't ready to settle down.

    If he's a confirmed single, understand he's unlikely to change, and you need to not get your hopes up that he will.

    If you are both in the same page- enjoy!!

  5. The only answers you're going to get are by speaking with him about this.

    It's a major, huge thing with children that you cannot fairly or realistically have him in 100% total control of your non-corporeal and barely-a-wink-of-your-eyes children that don't even exist yet – much less when they may well exist!

    Clearly something more is going on and this is a totally unrealistic request and expectation of his – you can't just have one parent “control” it, it's frankly a little concerning to phrase it as he has rather than anything else, either – as to be fair here, children deserve some control (once they're old enough, obviously) over their own futures and desires to pursue their own interests and not be forced by parents.

    I can presume and assume here that perhaps something happened with his own childhood and revolving around his studies? Or perhaps when he was older and perhaps his fear is that your future kids may be “pushed” and he doesn't want them to be? Who can tell.

    Find some time together, be respectful and fair and see where this leads – whatever's going on I'm sure we'd appreciate the update but here's hoping all the best for you both and whatever this is unearthing.

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