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She isn't your friend
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I'm glad to hear that and thanks for the supporting words.
The way I always look at a relationship is: it's not 50-50, it's 60-40. But both people are trying to be the one giving 60.
If my girlfriend collected creepy dolls and wanted to display em I'd hang up the shelves myself. Because, while it might not make me happy to see something like that, it would certainly make her happy to. And that's my goal in the relationship, that's how I win, by making her happy. And she's over there on the other side trying to do the same things for me.
What you might have here is that your boyfriend doesn't necessarily want you because of who you are, but what you can do for him. I.e. cooking, cleaning, and sex. He doesn't believe you need your own space because that's not cooking, cleaning, or sex. He doesn't want your horse figurines on display because that would imply that any square inch of the apartment wasn't there solely for his comfort. He wants his friends to see his cool gamer space, then brag that his girlfriend lives with him.
That's just the vibe I get from the incredibly limited information you've given. And you're both really young. Just have a real conversation about how you are a full, adult human being and you deserve to be an equal partner in the relationship. That means that you can display the things you like in addition to his stuff. That means you get to have a room where you can do your hobbies. If he still wants to say no, then it's probably time to get your own place where you can have those things.
P.s. Funko pops are infinitely more freaky looking than any horse figurines could possibly be.
Why are you in the middle of this at all…?
I am a daily smoker. I have a salaried job that pays me well. I have my own place. I’m the worst? Nah I just like to be relaxed while I do my work. If it’s not effecting her work, her home life, her family life, why the fuck does it matter how much she smokes?
Wow, what an asshole. He knew you wanted marriage and strung you along.
If you say somthing it is the same as asking her to stop. Just give it time, you WILL get over it once you are secure in the relationship.
If you say somthing it is the same as asking her to stop. Just give it time, you WILL get over it once you are secure in the relationship.
I’d be reassured that he wants her to meet you you. Maybe he just really likes her as a friend and wants her in your (pl) life. Together. As a friend. That seems a bit more plausible. If it was me I’d be trying to be friends with her. Because she’s obviously important enough to your husband to give up an evening for and cook for.
But also my husband would kick me out the kitchen. He’d not kick a guest out the kitchen. Guest manners and spouse manners.
Let the lawyer decide what she needs to do.
Lol this is just too weird.
I empathise with you here but I also think you’re hurting your own feelings a bit. Expressions of love can’t be forced and people have to be ready. Sounds like you’re only a couple of months in, so that’s fairly quick for some people. Part of being the first one to say that is knowing that you’re putting yourself out on an emotional limb; you can’t really turn around afterwards and feel like they left you hanging on that limb, since you put yourself there.
Flip side: I had a bf in my twenties who I said it first to. He said it back, albeit with a pause. A year later when we were having some nice chat I asked him when he first knew he loved me. He recounted an incident from MONTHS later. We ended up breaking up bf I could never get over the deception of him lying about his feelings bc he was too much of a coward to be honest.
Your bf is being honest which is all we can ask of those close to us.