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You have a lot of answers to everybody but here is my take. His sisters had the baby shower before the baby was born when she said it was his baby. That is normal and not suspicious. After the baby was born and he wanted a paternity test, she refused so he and his family questioned whether it was his child. Then she said she didn’t want him involved in the baby’s life and didn’t want child support, so that was more evidence to everyone that he wasn’t the father. She and the baby are out of your boyfriend and his family’s life, so why are you obsessing about it? Of course a child should know their father but he doesn’t want to be the father, she doesn’t want him to be the father, his family doesn’t see her or the baby now, so what’s the point? You are seeing lawyers, ordering the birth certificate and worrying about child support she hasn’t asked for. The child will find out who their father is when they are old enough to search in their own. You are stirring up trouble for no real reason. Let it go, tell the friend who got you riled up that the subject is dead, and enjoy your life with your boyfriend. In 18 years when you and he are married with kids of your own and a teenager shows up at your door, worry about it then.
Wait… was that a bad joke?
You’re right. I just don’t understand why he then begs for me back every time.
He thanked me for letting him know and asked if I was okay
It is good that he has you to be his support. An open line of communication is so important. I think sometimes that something mental health related should be kept between that person and a partner, because many times people either don’t understand or are self reflective on their own behaviors and emotional state or they are immature and make fun of others.
Stating that they want to speak with someone is the first step in healing. You’re welcome and good luck.
Good lord yea when I read the original I agree cut the cord. It does you no favors. When you’re not in their lives and things continue to go to shit they won’t have their normal scapegoat to blame.
I would also tell your brother to not give you anymore updates and that you are done will not be involved any further. Also request that they get not information on your life either.
Bro, get out.
My advice would be to tell your friend the dilemma. Tell her you hate his fucking guts but the guys are friends and your hubby would like you to be there. You can tell her the two options (you go and play nice for your hubby OR stay home) and see what her reaction is.
Truth is although it hurts: she has to understand that he will be around you (since your hubbies are friends) so you can skip this one but the next one you should go and try to play nice. Can’t avoid him forever.
I think she would appreciate you for thinking of her and her feelings but should also understand that you are both adults and this shitty situation is something that needs to get taken care of.
You seem like a really good friend
Best of luck!