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He keeps saying how he’s my friend and how he values that but it doesn’t seem like he does. He thinks my reaction to his disrespect is me being crazy
Don’t. You are still young. She will cheat again and you can never trust her after this. Be amicable with the break up. You’ll feel so much better in six months with this behind you.
I have it there because I’m usually respecting other people’s privacy, e.g. friends going through a crisis. Sometimes it’s also to protect them from my own burdens, e.g. family dysfunction.
He’s lied to you, that much you know. If you want you can give him a chance to come clean but you should be aware that even if he admits that he updated his Bumble recently whatever he says afterwards can’t be taken as ‘true’.
I’m sorry for your pain
It sounds like he wants to have you move there to control you and your future. Depending on where he lives you could end up with no rights for yourself or children. You need to research this throughly before you do anything. You are right to be afraid for yourself and children. If you move there you may never be allowed to leave or take your children.
Don’t help him cheat. You know you shouldn’t do it. You know it’s wrong. It also doesn’t help you get over him at all.
He’s a coward. He’s weak. Block him and move on. All he’s going to do is make you feel worse.
Yeah she does. However she’s not the type to just rebound. I am in touch with her roommates and I checked in with them to see if she was okay, and they told me she has been at home and not seeing anyone…. Again, who knows if that’s the truth.
Noted.
Clear out your account and get a lawyer.
If she hasn't been interested in dating you before now, she likely isn't interested. Even less interested, since you don't want a committed relationship. You don't receive anything to suggest she is interested in you at all. Even your “friendship” sounds like you pushed her for that.
You could ask, but be prepared for that to end any relationship or friendship with her. I mean, you take your shot… she's interested or she isn't. And if she isn't, you NEED to take “no” for an answer. She may not be comfortable keeping you as a friend, knowing that you want to date her. Especially, since you aren't looking for a long term relationship, which suggests you only want to have sex with her. I mean, when you say “date” but don't want romance or companionship, what else is there? While there are plenty of women who are cool with that, there are plenty of others who would NOT. Some might even be insulted…
because what is the need ?
He’s controlling ?
Bro, if she doesn’t reach out to you in 3 days, I would say it’s safe to assume you’re single. She’s 31 and goes radio silent when you have an argument? This behavior is abusive. Don’t chase her when she’s in the wrong.
Give her a few days and if you don’t hear from her, end it. This is not the future you want.
Even prior to baby, I had planned on being committed to girlfriend for a long time. It’s like finding a long lost piece of you. She makes the world feel colorful
Ok, but then you don’t let it be an issue.
The 2 of you need therapy, and not thru the church!
You need to learn to talk to each other.
Your mother is only interested in protecting herself and her brother
Take the experience. LDR will should you how much he really loves you. You can consider moving once you start to get established in your field
Until he lies about not wanting more kids, then “changes his mind” in a couple years and puts all the pressure, guilt, and emotional blackmail onto her.
Well that’s unfair.
Not to encourage whataboutism, but if she wants to be humbled real check, check the date analytics on her phone.
Games>scrolling imo.
You are going through a normal process of grief after a breakup and it hurts to everybody, but you probably have less experience with heartache than other people your age because of what you describe as being cold.
Regarding her, you dodge a bullet. She lied to you because she went on searching for someone immediately. She was too forward with involving you with her daughter.
Time to focus on yourself and don’t fear the risk of opening yourself up in the future.