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First and foremost, I don't think you or your concerns are stupid. Yes you were both teens, and confused as he was, his actions still deeply hurt you and have affected who you've become. I always air on the side of caution, so this is what I propose you do as well.
You may be in love with him but it may be that you need to take a step back and spend time with someone else or even just yourself. He won't be the last person you ever love or have romantic feelings for. And as you mentioned, this has impacted other relationships you've been in (are they hiding things, etc.). As someone who tried to be with someone who cheated on me again after they cheated, I couldn't trust them no matter the effort they put into rebuilding that trust with me. Now, you know yourself better than I do, but do you really think you'll be able to offer him a fresh start in a relationship with you?
I don't think you should ghost him or anything if you've rebuilt a friendship with him, but be careful, careful, careful. As it stands right now, after reading your post, I don't think you should be in a relationship with this person again, because even if he doesn't cheat you may never be able to get away from eating feeling that he is.
This is asking for trouble it never goes well… it’s like finding out your partner cheated and you want to know where they did it how they did it but really don’t want to know but we do… oof
You won't survive this series of red flags.
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Yes.
So is food.
But did you want to be raped?
It reeks of insecurity. Similar to men not wanting their girlfriends to use toys.
I am so sorry. I think no matter what happens or wether she is telling the truth or not you will always have this incident weighing heavily on your mind. It might cuse resentment in the future, and the battle of you not wanting to be controlling vs this incident and trying to avoid it in the future could stress you and cause you a great deal of anxiety, I don't want to say try therapy, because I am lenient to say trust your gut.
End the relationship.
Do not, I repeat do not lend any support to her especially not financially.
She either sees you as another client, in which case you didn’t have a relationship at all, or she has been cheating on you for the entire time you have been together. In both cases she is a horrible toxic person, not worthy of your time or energy.
If she doesn’t leave quickly and quietly, then make sure you tell her family and friends exactly why you have ended the relationship.
We can hope for a troll and not an abusive relationship!
Why would you need to ask this? WIFE, evidently!