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He needs it. He also needs individual therapy to deal with his pacifying behaviour towards an individual who could lead to his children getting sick -or worse- from pills being left around. That's not to mention the psychological ramifications of being around a person like that.
Whatever happens, this cannot go on. Something has to give and, if your husband has any sense at all, it will be your FIL's involvement that is the 'give'.
Otherwise, he stands to lose everything. As much as you love him, you will reach your breaking point.
So his attitude isn’t really one of a religious person, unless he’s from some strict cult or something, while the service itself might be somber, then reception afterwards is often filled with conversation, especially people catching up, retelling stories about the deceased etc.
But as for your issues with your ‘friend’ that is giving you anxiety…. Why would you text them after a funeral? I’m sorry but that seems to be the height of stupidity.
Why add to an already emotional day more stress by doing that?
And as for him saying he’s tired of the situation – how long have you been dealing with this? Because if you are constantly texting this ‘friend’ causing yourself anxiety, and it’s been any length of time, I think most people would be tired of it, you deserve support for your anxiety, but if you are causing it yourself then that support has a finite supply, and lessens every time you cause your anxiety.
I would say make small challanges to her to see if she is willing to match your energy. Dont ask her to 360 her entire life. If you love her but feel you need her to come further. Tell her first, and then use some gentle nudging.
Where did OP accuse the husband of cheating?
Nbd it's called different things everywhere but I was the one who was unaware that alimony was used as one of those terms so thanks for the TIL!
You’re right.
It’s crazy because I don’t feel stressed at all with him. But my confidence is not anywhere close to where it used to be.
She was your ex. She is not your property. Funny how is always how she has nothing to be blamed at, as if she was forced or something like that. You should block your toxic ex for life and maybe get some therapy for your sexism.
Considering the drifting apart, she's more just a friend rather than a close one and you shouldn't expect much from her anymore. You'll only be disappointed if you do.
If he wanted to date you, he’s had two years to do it ??♀️
I mean that's the one “hinty” thing she's described doing. While that was clearly a misstep, it seems like she's tried to bring it up in a more straightforward way lots of times and he's been evasive.
I agree she needs to insist on a “proper” conversation about the timeline but I don't think she's expecting him to read her mind.
I felt this way with my relationship until I worked on my anxious attachment style. When I felt insecure in the relationship I couldn't help but constantly obsess over us/him and it was ruining my life. Check out r/attachmentstyles and r/anxiousattachment
You're a convenience and she'll drop you as soon as she has found something else. Stay away from people who want to use you. Move on to someone who will treat you with the respect you deserve.
Hell, my dad stopped buying me clothes when I left for college lol
Girl I read to the end, you are ready to leave him so leave him. Duh.
Yeah but if you feel shitty about sex then thatsa red flag. That's our body communicating something. Aside for that there's íntimacy, which is lacking. Like íntimacy shouldnt just be after. It should be during