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Your children need better role models than you are right now. Do you want them to grow up thinking they should accept being cheated on? Do you want them to think they should cheat on their future partners? How about with how you’re being treated? You want them to think all of this is normal? Girl set a better example for your children by loving and respecting yourself.
This, yet Christians also have abortions all the time, so what they're saying in their post/comments is all so contradicting. Cherry pickin affff.
Why would she “attack” your problem?
It's your potential baby, not hers.
Not everyone is okay with dating a partner with a child, potential or not, when the initial layout didn't have any.
Do you like who you are when you are with him?
every 2 weeks or so he calls and I pick up, we talk and then end up arguing.
He has a rule that I'm not allowed to swear in front of him, sometimes when we've gotten really heated I've called him an a**hole which in times like this he turns around on me, I.e, he's allowed to call me names regularly because of that one time I called him a name
If the first thing my boyfriend wanted to do was change my body after getting a good job –
I would run away so fucking fast.
This is a severe red flag.
The only favorably thing I can say about your argument is that she probably should have said something before moving in. However, everything you did after she said you should wear clothes is problematic.
First thing: she did not tell you that her daughter was uncomfortable. She told you that you needed to wear clothes around a young girl. I'm not sure why you're shocked. Your girlfriend was probably shocked that she even had to say something.
Second thing: after she told you to wear clothes around a young girl, you thought that it would be in any way, ever, appropriate to have a conversation with her daughter about an adult concern.
A teenage girl is NEVER going to tell a person in a position of authority, who lives in the same house, that his nudity makes her uncomfortable. She's going to tell her mom. Then her mom will talk to the man. The man, who has common sense and is not a pervert, is going to immediately realize that he should wear clothes.
The fact that you didn't, that you're actively campaigning against wearing clothes, is kind of concerning.
I want to preface the rest of my comment by saying that this is not an accusation, it's just a very intense response. You're putting yourself at risk with this behavior.
I want to explain something that you really, really need to know. For your own good. When we are learning the signs of grooming behavior that predators use to gain access, there are three things happening here that someone outside of the situation would point out.
The first is that you are attempting to circumvent her mother to create a relationship with this girl that excludes her mom. For example: instead of accepting that your girlfriend is the authority on appropriate behavior around her child, you went to her daughter to create evidence to undermine her mother's authority. Thus, your relationship with her daughter excludes her mother.
The second is that your behavior begins to isolate the girl. She may have told her mom, or her mom just notices, that something makes her uncomfortable. And her discomfort is not unwarranted. Then you used her mother's perfectly reasonably request against her daughter. So now, if she goes to her mom, she has to worry about you confronting her. She cannot feel safe going to her mom, because you'll double down on the impropriety.
The third is that she is already aware of the power imbalance in your house, and you just emphasized it. They moved into your house. The girl is aware that if something goes wrong, they are going to be homeless.
If something like this had happened when my husband moved in with my son and me, I'd have been gone before you even had time to post this.
You fucked up, in a huge way.
What the… he's so rude. He's soooo damn rude. This would be a breaking point for me.
I'd tell him: “Hey, I tell you your behaviour hurts me and all you do is asking me if that makes me happy and wet? You do know well that you're disrespectful towards my feelings. You did mistakes and all I wish for is for you to own up to it. I am done with this behaviour. If you want to play this game with me, fine. But don't expect me to ever trust you again if you're willing to play it. I turn off my notifications. You better think about your words.”
Why do you feel the need to be treated like a doormat?
My ex also treated me like this.
Doesn’t matter what his sexuality is, you didn’t have an open relationship and he purposely cheated.
Same. One too many “you're a smart girl” would trigger a “you know what, I AM a smart girl and I've just realised I don't have time to play stupid games with someone who can't or won't use his grown up words”.
Dump her. Straight up tell her the reason why you’re dumping her too.
Oh honey, every inch of your body is beautiful.
The right partner would never dream of insulting you in this way.
You deserve to feel good about yourself.
Who hurt you so badly that you believe this is as good as it gets for you?
Please break up with him. Do it for you. Take all of the energy you were putting in to this relationship and pour it into loving yourself. You are worthy of kindness and compassion, especially from yourself.
Get reacquainted with your body. Touch your curves. Pleasure yourself. Find the natural love that you have for yourself. You deserve to feel that love honey. You deserve to feel pleasure. You deserve to feel good in your body. You are beautiful. Every single inch of you.
Be kind to yourself. You never deserved any of this.
R/momforaminute is a really good place to post if you are looking for support.