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Exactly this. I'm not sure how well you know your gf. If I'm texting my friends saying a dude is hot and I want to kiss him… guess what, I think he's very hot and I would kiss him if given the opportunity.
I don’t think your mom is putting money towards those cousins party because she thinks they deserve it or anything. It’s probably more of an image/family expectation, she doesn’t want to be the one who did nothing. Or she only had expectations for you and don’t care for others. It doesn’t matter though.
She deprived you from an experience you dreamed of all your life because she felt you didn’t deserve it and pretended it was about money when it was not. It’s normal that you feel hurt and the issue is unresolved. You have the right to express you do resent her for that, that you felt hurt and betrayed when you discovered it wasn’t actually a money issue, but her judging you not deserving of your party, and that seeing how she doesn’t care and participate in the quinceanera for everybody else does hurt you even more. There is no other way to put it.
But honestly I don’t know if anything good can come out of the conversation. She was wrong but she probably doesn’t see it or will not recognise it. She might never apologise and judge you even more. If she doesn’t recognise her wrong doings and you’re not ready to forgive without that , the relationship can’t move on from the event. So maybe it’s better to not discuss it further and take some distance.
Seems like you both are on two different boats, just passing each other in the night. If the love is still there, that's one thing, but if the work needed to actually be close again is one-sided, then you will only be putting in all the effort for nothing…
Sit down and have a serious talk about what you both want and what you are willing to do or sacrifice to make it work again…
Its unfortunate that it took 3 years for him to realize the two of you are most likely not compatible. It's also unfortunate that he reacted the way he did instead of discussing it like adults.
The bright side, at least the two of you are now free to move on.
It doesn’t matter if she is wrong. Didn’t you cheat? So why do you think you hold some moral ground over her.
I sacrifice time with friends and to myself to see her every weekend.
You sacrifice? Seeing your own gf and I'm assuming getting laid is a sacrifice? Or do you think you're doing her such a big favour for taking a few hours from your busy schedule to honour her with your presence.
gets pouty and acts like she forgot all that I’ve ever done for her
Maybe that's because you clearly see her as a chore and forget everything she does for you? Valentine's day wasn't that far back, how come you forgot what she did for you then?
Shopping for and cooking a whole meal takes a lot more effort than booking a restaurant table by the way.
There's a difference between being financially savvy/frugal and being a cheapskate. Maybe you're sliding into the latter group? Something to consider.
I’m not sure what your relationship with her is like. Maybe your relationship is on the rocks and this is some kind of test or a jealousy ploy? Or maybe she’s basically telling you she’s going to fuck the dude?
One thing it is NOT is a standard lodging arrangement for a work trip.
And probably a billion trillion where no cheating happened that you don’t hear about.
Girl it’s been 2 years of this. You may wanna be in a relationship with bob but bob does not wanna be in a relationship with you. You’ll thank yourself for not putting up with this mess any longer when you’re older. Good call on setting a boundary.
Dude has functional fingers that he can use if he really wants to make you happy?
I'm assuming between what you have and his $150,000 you can buy a house cash. No down payment, brother loan, or mortgage needed.
I took her to universal in February. ?‍♀️. I don’t exclude her from things.
This post has reached one of our comment/karma limits. The text of the post has been preserved below.
English is not my first language, so I hope you don’t mind the errors.
I(21f) and my boyfriend (24m) have been together for almost 2 years. I love him so much and he loves me. We work together (we are both freelancers in the same career, so when one of us has a job, the other goes to help, but I don’t get as many jobs as he does because he’s been in the industry longer than me) and all our money goes to my account and we’ve never had any issue about this. A few days ago, we had a very huge fight and so many things were said. He had work the next day. I spent the night crying and told him he would have to go to work alone. He was gone when I woke up, and when I checked my phone, he had transferred the money to his account. I texted him to ask why, and he said “it’s time I lead the house, I cared about you too much and you don’t see it. I’m going to be like other men, and when you realize what you’ve lost, you’ll tell me and we’ll go back to how things were before.” Apparently, he was hurt because he went to work alone, so I sucked it up, asked him to send me some money so I could take a ride and go to help him, which I did, but it was hell for me since I took breaks every 30 minutes to go cry in the bathroom. I ended up not helping him as much, but he had called his friends to help, so it wasn’t a big deal.
So, fast forward to today. We were having a conversation about the fight, and I asked him why he said what he said about being the “man of the house,…” and he said it was just to teach me a lesson, that I “should appreciate what i have,” and that he’s not like other men, since he helps with chores and stuff. I told him if that’s what he intended to teach me, then he failed because it only changed the way I viewed him as a partner, I told him how it hurt me and how I wish he hadn’t done it. He said he doesn’t regret it. I’m starting to think I overreacted, but on the other hand, I feel like he shouldn’t have done that. Please help.