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Ya do it. Fuck some shit up. UpdateMe!
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Don’t sell your house, if you really want to move in with her rent your house.
He has already checked out the relationship but wants you to be the one to break up, so he's not the bad guy to his friends.
Woah. Pump the brakes, OP. Not only does this man want to make financial decisions that ostensibly effect you both, he's also assuming access to use of your credit for his own benefit. If we're talking about where the potential benefit is, of doing anything, it's always “does this benefit the relationship?”. It's not “what benefits me, individually?”. I don't blame you for having a ton of problems with his idea of how this car thing should play out. Frankly, I'd be kind of pissed off in your shoes.
It sounds like it's time to lay down some boundaries around money and credit. It's not going to be a fun conversation. In fact, it will very likely be a fight. But it's a necessary fight, before you guys commit to a lifetime together. Vastly different financial goals or views will be a pretty nasty sticking point in a marriage. Better to hash that out now, than spend the next few decades at each other's throats about it.
And yeah. It might be a deal breaker. You're allowed to set whatever boundaries you want. It's up to him whether or not he can accept them/live with them. Actually, if you decide to move forward after that (probably difficult) conversation, counseling probably wouldn't be a terrible idea. You're going to have to be on the same page about money and credit and your financial situation, and what your goals and values are in that department. Having a mediator to help you work through the details would frankly probably be a better investment in your future than a vehicle would.
I’ve done that, it’s killing me seeing him like this. I want to help him but I can’t when I don’t know what’s wrong.
Sorry but that's what happen when you don't use protection with ppl you don't really know… It's better to get std screened and to be sure your partner is ok to don't use protection. Because you were in the middle of the heated moment, is never an excuse to forget condoms. You always had you head to think about the consequences like stds or kids…