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Also, and I understand that youth is a player in this, she's 22.
How many men could you have possibly known overall? What was this guy competing with, her dad, some cousins and maybe a few guys she knew from school?
yes i would
Height is not a reason to continue or discontinue, nor is other people's opinion. People are always going to look at you, guess you can never have a relationship, do anything, or even exist.
Sis, you’re gonna have to admit you cheated. I know you have your own personal reasons for it but you cheated. No matter how much you felt ignored, unloved, or whatever you didn’t do anything to help your marriage cheating. The thing that I feel is gonna be difficult for you if you choose therapy is that it’s gonna be geared to YOU earning HIS trust again. You’re not going to like that because you think you’re the victim here.
People get divorced every day. Just file the paperwork, keep it amicable for the kids, get therapy FOR YOURSELF because baby you need it, and just know that your current relationship probably won’t last cause he’s never gonna fully trust you. But go be happy
I whole heartedly agree
Sometimes I read these I can only imagine it has to be satire.
So you decided to have a half committed relationship with her since she already has a boyfriend. You ended up not liking her. So now you want to randomly tell him.
You sound immature, spiteful, and attention seeking. If you want the drama, then, by all means, go for it. If not, leave her up to her own vices. It will catch up to her.
If you were aware of her cheating, and wanted to tell him as a friend, I would understand that. You just sound like you love drama.
He has ruined you because you still think about him after 10 years. He is still in your head when your fiancé and children should be all you think about. By now he knows what your life is like and blocking him would let him know you don’t care anymore and don’t want him involved in the life you have now. And remember he said he wouldn’t marry YOU, not that he wouldn’t get married because he has a wife and kids. If he did actually talk to you and say he wanted you back, would you give up your home for him hoping it would work out even though it might not? Is that your fantasy? Both of you sharing custody of your children with exes, not knowing if the kids would get along, having to coordinate switch offs, etc. You are reading too much into the Facebook situation. Unless you actually ask him, you are just guessing and like I said, that is just hurting the man who does love you, who has been loyal to you and who doesn’t obsess over his exes. Be thankful for what you have so you don’t lose it.
Okay depends on what you judge her character is now. 3 years is a long time and she could be telling the truth. Only you know her personality is their any red flags.
well on his birthday he saw my car and snapped a picture of the parking spot and said my car was there… then days later he proceeded on screenshotting someones story of me Lol
this happened in october. apperently he went to las vegas and miami.
days later when he came back he pops up at my desk “hey!!” Lmao
like bro….
this situation is so difficult bc i want him… why cut off someone u want?
and its not like i try he just pops up
I'm assuming you're American. Honestly we've been so brainwashed into believing that we MUST BE WORKING AT ALL TIMES OR WE'RE LAZY BUMS!!! That even when there's no real hurry to find a new job some of us get anxious AF. Maybe sit down with her and explain (again if necessary) that your bills are covered, getting a better job will benefit you more in the long run and there really isn't any reason to panic.
Y’all need counseling.
What a leech
This man is using you. He doesn’t care about you. And clearly he found the thing that works
Kick him out. Whatever he does with his life is not your responsibility or your fault
THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR THREATENING TO KILL YOUR FAMILY.
Get the fuckouttahere with this bullshit “whataboutism”.
Don't. Stay away from her.
The power imbalance and age difference is too much. This is giving massive creepy grooming vibes.
Break up for two reasons…
She’s clearly not invested in your relationship as she should be. She’s done and thought things outside the bounds of your relationship and that’s pretty obvious and nothing to be argued about.
You went through her phone without asking; that’s a shitty thing on it’s own, also outside the bounds of the relationship, not to mention personal privacy. In my opinion, once you go through phones without asking, it’s just best to break up because the trust OBVIOUSLY isn’t there.
Right, but now your other 2 friends have this as their memory for the night: these 2 assholes can't play a game and have fun
So were you like completely asexual until you met him and then your body allowed you to feel intimate things only when you got together?
Cause if that’s not the case, it should be obvious that everybody is just chasing cars until they finally catch one. You’re lucky he found ya. Stop making a mess of it.
Aha age old problem
A few things, I know you have a lot of anger toward that girl but bear in mind that she was also a minor, she may not have been entirely in control of that situation and more importantly, her hypersexual behavior at that age speaks to the fact that she herself was more than likely a victim of SA herself. Finally, wherever she is in her life right now, inviting her back into contact with your bf will probably not help anyone – particularly if it comes from you. If she is motivated to make amends, or if your bf wants to confront her (verbally, obviously, not physically!), that is a different story.
Please also bear in mind that this is a process. Your bf has a road in front of him. There is no easy switch here. A lot of it happened a long time ago, plus other stuff piled on top. Going through therapy will not be pleasant, especially trying to dig up and re-examine/re-frame core memories. He's going to be vulnerable and he may not like that. I think you will need support and guidance yourself on an ongoing basis to be a good support to him. And patient. You're both still growing and figuring things out (going by the fact that you are 21 and your prefrontal cortex is still developing). Give yourselves some grace and time. Keep swimming.
Make sure to stop listening to music and movies, enjoying sports, going to religious ceremonies etc. if that's your attitude. There are bastards hurting people involved in all of it.