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You proposed to the illusion of a person. I'd say it's null and void when it's based on dishonesty and a lie.
Now it's your choice to go forward but I'd call off the engagement if it was me. If you guys can rebuild to that point again great but that's a huge broken trust to rebuild.
This is easily the stupidest comment on this post.
I see a couple other people mentioning therapy and that might not be the worst idea. While you can probably work some of it out on your own, he could also probably benefit from therapy if he’s been feeling depressed recently. It can be a way to escape from everyone at the home and have some time you himself. You can always make therapy a “date” and go on a date after the session so it’s time with just the two of you. Personally I have a lower sex drive and my husband has had to talk to me before about never wanting to have sex. I feel it’s more of a chore for me and I do it to satisfy him. But when we actually have sex it is great and I have never said “that was a waste of time”, it’s the act of getting started that’s the most difficult for me. In regards to chores, my husband is also the same way about not wanting to do chores and any he does he isn’t the happiest about it. So we split the chores up. We have talked about what works for us and figured out a “divide and conquer” technique with them. Spending more time away from the tv and video games could definitely help too. It could be too hard to tear away from the screen, especially if his sex drive is lower to begin with. Also big thing is maybe take a “love languages” test to figure those out and avoid disappointment or miscommunication. His love language might be words of affirmation (hence all the notes) while yours may be acts of service (wanting the flowers). If so he thinks he is showing you how much he loves you because that’s how he feels loved. Once my husband and I took that test it made a world of a difference. Sorry I know this is a lot but I hope there is some use information in here for you
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I didn't even read the post. Nobody in a relationship needs to use dating apps to make friends, especially not friends of the opposite sex.
He's cheating, or attempting to cheat.
Do him a favor and let him go. Your no good for him, nor for anyone right now
I'm not going to read over 250 comments, so here's my two cents, sorry if they're repetition:
Have her head checked, both ways. Regardless of intention, she's gaslighting you – falsifying reality which can destabilize someone emotionally and undermine their sanity.
Literally, the woman could have a tumour. Or she could have some severe issues around her child and her mother-role that could end up screwing up the kid.
While folks are talking about this as a good parenting and instructing move on her part – they're ignoring the gas lighting or making assumptions justifications – as if such a heinous thing is truly justifiable.
Good luck OP.
Non compatible. You need to end it. Your very undemanding needs are not being met. Not her fault, not yours either. Just incompatible?‍♀️?‍♀️
We are early in our relationship (4 months) and hadn't really clearly said, “hey sexting other people is inappropriate”
After becoming official boyfriend-girlfriend, there are many behaviors that for me fall into the “goes without saying” category, and sexting other people of one of those things. Also, fuck him for getting angry at you.
Firstly, she is an adult and clearly knew you could get injured that way.
Secondly, she needs to get help with this. I once injured my knee slacklining and I tried to let it heal on its own, which was dumb. A long ass time later it still hurt and I even developed a limp. I was dumb and like “nooo I have permanently injured myself” until I went to physiotherapy. After a few sessions with acupuncture and exercises, it was good as new. It’s not too late for her to be healed, she just has to actually take care of it.
Not your fault, you’re just her scapegoat