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Is he nervous because of the age difference?
If the guy is that big of an asshat, then it’s up in the air as to weather there was an affair. It seems like he is enjoying messing with you.
On the other hand, why would your wife never mention seeing him at the wedding. It’s likely they hooked up at the night, maybe a time or two, but maybe not a full blown affair.
I’m not dumb and obviously know that he’s dated girls before me.
In that case it's best not to act like the discovery is some shocking revelation. It's not. It's just a piece of history, a piece of the past. Him dating people before you isn't a slight toward you, him dating people before you isn't a slap in the face nor a long term game to fuck with your head. Him dating people before you just is, fact of life stuff. Grasping on this like a dog gnawing on an old bone does you no favors.
I asked him if he could understand just a little bit of why I’m bothered and he said he couldn’t.
It helps to elaborate what actually bothers you about the situation. It's a picture of him and an ex. That's it. You won't burn by touching it. You won't be struck blind by seeing it. Its mere existence won't suddenly make you drop dead from poison or some obscure radiation. You can and should approach this as a discussion to have over treating it as something which would make you physically melt away.