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I think you're being a bit paranoid here. There's no reason to believe he would want to catch up on “lost time”. Why would he do that if he has the greatest time with you?
And plus you are guiding him into this first relationship, trying to make it as healthy as possible. You're amazing you know that?
You seem to be made for each other , who knows! Just make the best of it!
Do not make any plans with her, let her do it. When/if she asks why she hasn't seen you or your child, tell her she never asked.
She has a favorite, and it doesn't seem to be you, so you need to protect your daughter from being hurt.
Before you reply to your ex you should break off the engagement and break up with your fiancé.
Anything else is shit behaviour because all you’ll be doing is seeing how much greener the grass is before moving to the next field.
Your loyal fiancée is owed more than that. She deserves to be treated kindly, not compared to your teenage crush without her knowing what your doing.