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My god. You've been LIVING TOGETHER — essentially already living a married life, as you noted — yet you put off proposing because you're not sure how you want to do it? BULLSH*T. Deep down, you don't want to get married. Stop stringing the poor woman along. Grow a pair and stop being a d*ck.
Get a paternity test done just to prove he's the father and then kick him out and divorce him.
Well, if your bf was cheating then this was maybe the worst way for a 3rd party to convince you. I generally don't think images like this are a good indicator if someone is cheating, it's way too easy to fake this stuff. And to top it, you're living with him so you'd be able to know if something seemed off.
She may not be smashing but it's likely she (in spite of your interpretation ) is not as crazy about you as a prospective life partner and doesn't want to be exclusive.
No your bf should point blank turn this woman down and express that boundaries have been crossed and that her feelings are in no way reciprocated on his end. You didn't do anything wrong so why are you the one with all the burden?
Not dealing with this is only going to make it awkward for the whole group. Because they likely enjoy game night and may just reschedule it at someone else's place.
You don't want to be the odd couple out and isolate yourself from the group. But he also needs to take a stand and not be so nonchalant about this.
OP, have some self respect and get some standards.
There us a reason this completely incompetent person is trying to date and move fast with someone so young. The women his age would have already run away and not wasted their time.
Cut him loose. Don’t introduce someone so quickly to your young child. Make sure someone meets HIGHER standards of personal competence before jumping into a relationship with them.
Dude. Leave. Please, god, for your own sanity and future, leave. Do you really want to deal with these kinds of unreasonable outbursts for the foreseeable future? Does that sound like it'll make you happy?
I promise you, you don't have to deal with crazy bullshit to have a loving relationship. This is not normal. Change takes a concerted amount of long term effort, and do you really want to wait around in the hopes she'll make those changes for YOU, whom she has little problem suddenly freaking out on?
Nah bro. Find yourself a relationship involving a reasonable level of stress. Be out. Please.
What do you gain for telling him?
These „men“ are all immature as fuck being jealous about seeing a couple being happy. Don‘t give a fuck about them. I‘d completely ignore it.
You should never avoid speaking your mind or standing up for yourself to avoid an argument. Anyone who would turn that into an argument is not worthy of your time.
Okay let's set your age aside for a moment.
I was 37 when I got married. I'm a female. I had been with my ex for 7 years at that point. In our relationship he definitely disregarded my wishes, belittled me, straight up lied about me and either physically or at least emotionally cheated on me (I found his dating profiles a year before we separated.)
I never really wanted to get married. When he proposed it was around my birthday. I had been sick and we had been fighting a lot and his solution was to ask me to marry him while I was bedridden and sick so I could get on his insurance as fast as possible. Like I said we had been together so long, the idea of saying no never occurred to me. Like it was as automatic as if he asked me if I wanted a drink of water.
Leading up to the wedding (which was a small courthouse wedding because I was that unenthused about it where I literally didn't care what we did,) I thought of every way possible to get out of it. Like I knew in the back of my mind that my exSO was possessive and controlling and abusive and I wanted out so bad but I had no idea how to pump the brakes on it.
Fast forward to the night of my bachelorette “party,” it was me and three girlfriends going to sushi and then OMG the forbidden thing was I was going to go to a bar with them. I wasn't “supposed,” to go to a bar, especially the dive bar I liked. My ex texted me over and over and wanted to check in with me over and over through out our dinner. We took some pictures in front of the restaurant and then the second I stepped foot in the bar he called me and started screaming at me. See while I was at the bachelorette party he decided to tear through all of my belongings and found two OLD, im talking one of them was from before we met cell phones and go through the texts. He found texts he didn't like, didn't matter what year they were from. He was screaming and threatening me to call off the wedding etc, until I took an uber home.
All the way home I just wanted to call my family and say this is not happening.
But my sister's plane tickets were booked. My dress was already altered, we already had an appointment to get married. Why on earth would my opinion matter at this point?
I imagine you feel that guilt. Like what will this do to other people?
It will do nothing to them, but it will hurt you. I was married for three years and I caught him cheating. He hit me several times. He policed every move I made. I was basically 100% right and if I had trusted my gut I would have saved both of us a hell of a lot of money and heart ache.
I've been separated for 5 years, divorced for 4. I never once thought, yo maybe I shouldn't have gotten divorced. I have thought, damn I shouldn't have gotten married.
Back to your age though, you have a million lives to live! before you decide on the one that is your “forever” life (by the way nothing is forever, just don't die, everything else can be fixed,) so if you're not feeling this, call it off, chuck it, throw it in a flaming dumpster and never look back. Screw what other people think, this is about you and the next 60-80 years of your life on this planet.