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Just make sure you're not allowing their journey to overshadow your own. If you also feel like you have room to explore, and change, and discover yourself in this relationship, then that's amazing and I wish you two all the best in growing up together. But if all your energy is going towards supporting their journey, and you have none left for your own, then its worth considering the steps you need to take to protect yourself in this relationship. The problem with approaching any relationship with the attitude that, “I'll have them as long as they'll have me,” is that it completely devalues you as a person. Perhaps, “I'll have them as long as they deserve me,” would be a healthier approach.
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You're a grown up. Getting from A to B is your responsibility.
You’re allowed anyone else. But you’re upset that you can’t have your friend as a GF. Your wife wants your physical needs taken care of not your emotional. If you’re doing something that feels wrong then your marriage is doomed. However, your wife kind of brought that on herself.
I would call off the engagement on the grounds that he cheated on you while claiming he you were both exclusively dating. Your entire relationship is founded on lies.
There's a difference between a hysterectomy and getting your tubes tied.
He spends time alone doing something that he’s passionate about for 1-2 hours while his family SLEEPS. Do you lack comprehension skills?
I’m generally not in favor of ultimatums in relationships but this is the kind of thing that is absolutely non-negotiable in this situation. OP, this dude needs therapy, badly.
UpdateMe!
Yes. Nothing is going to happen. Unless he's doing it so often that it impacts your life I wouldn't care. In fact you should go with him and observe. It's a pretty soulless activity. When the money stops so does the dance. A once in a while guys night or bachelor party isn't a big deal.