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First of all, you're not homophobic just because you rejected her. We all have people we are simply not interested in that way whether of the same or opposite sex. She just took your rejection poorly.
Second, your reaction to pull away from the friendship does not make you homophobic. When you see someone as a friend and they see you as something more it makes things awkward, especially when they take your rejection poorly.
Hold your head up and rise above her pettiness and that of the others who have harassed you. Find some new friends.
You did the right thing and you’re strong for doing it. Just don’t marry this other guy right away tho.
On the off chance that he’s unusually dense and not willfully dismissive of your needs, it’s time to have a crystal clear conversation to leave no ambiguity or wiggle room in his understanding.
Tell him that going forward, not one sexual encounter ever will include PIV until AFTER you’ve had your pain-managing orgasm. If he doesn’t want to perform oral he can use his hands or a vibrator on your external bits, take time to explore your body for other erogenous zones, whatever. But he cannot demand you endure painful sex in the afternoon simply because he helped make it less painful in the morning. Every encounter should be good for both of you.
You’ll know whether this relationship is salvageable based on how he reacts to this conversation, both in the moment and in his bedroom behavior going forward. If he whines about it being “too much work,” ask him how much excruciating abdominal pain that “work” causes him. Hold firm. He gets with the program or he gets nothing.
You don't think you're in love with him anymore. I mean, do you even really like him at this point? At the very least, the resentment is building, there doesn't appear to be any change in sight, and it's only a matter of time. Either way, you should not stay in a relationship just because he's not getting a job and you feel bad.
If you're paying for everything, you need to have a conversation with him and let him know you're going to stop. His financial situation isn't your responsibility so stop letting him make it your problem. He needs to start paying for half.
You need to break up with him. Your number one priority has to be your child. This man sounds like a hazard to your kid’s health. He’s 34, if he hasn’t learned how to be a responsible safe adult yet then it’s unlikely he’s gonna learn anytime soon, even if he puts effort into it. The real questions are – do you want to risk your kid’s health for however long it takes? Do you want this man modeling this unsanitary and unsafe behavior for your child?
Should wouldn't be posting otherwise.
So apparently not.
Yeah, one of us is weird and I don't think it's me.
Animals as in murdering them or raising them as pets?
Calling out specific women for shitty behavior doesn’t mean I’m a woman hater, it means I call out shitty behavior. When women do shitty things, they deserve to be called out without the protection from criticism that labeling someone a woman hater provides.
You’re saying you’re perfectly fine breaking your vows if a child from your husbands past comes into the picture, which obviously means the vows you made were worthless. Same with OPs wife. Both of you suck for that, and just because I like having commitment less sex doesn’t mean I’m wrong.
I’ve had all kinds of relationships lady. But you’re right, I’ve never had one where money is the most important factor or where I would break my vows because the physical embodiment of my inadequacies came into the picture. You’re definitely unique on those.
Why, what do you mean, women are ALWAYS telling their current boyfriend “how great the dick was” when they happen to drive past the apartment of an old hookup. It's such a normal and not at all insane thing to say, and definitely really happened in real life
Couldn't have put it better ^ Please listen OP and distance yourself from this messy situation