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If you want to post something long, just hit return twice in a row every 3-4 sentences. As long as there’s some white space on the page, we can read for days.
It’s just the distance I have to go really. 50 quid and 150 miles is a long way. I go down often already. But I feel really guilty about saying I’d go then not
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Maybe show some concern and compassion for your wife who is struggling with depression and raising a kid? 4 year olds are no joke.
You don't say much about how things are balanced at home – but caring for kids and post partum is all really difficult. She may just not even have time to care about herself, but I don't know how your stuff is balanced.
What I'm hearing here is a lot of concern about your own needs, and not a lot of concern about her. It might be best if you worked on an amicable divorce so you can both be close by for your kid, and have the freedom to pursue partners that would be better suited to you.
I have no advice. I just wanted to say that I’m just so sad for the two of you and the situation you’ve landed in. Good luck to both of you.
How do I [27M] help my fiance [28F] get over the resentment she feels towards the women who abused me?
TL;DR: I was sexually abused for much of my childhood and the women who were responsible are still in my life. My fiance really doesn't like them, and I want to help her get over that.
I mean, you don't “help her get over” your childhood sexual abuse. That isn't something you can do.
I recommend you and she attend some counselling together to discuss whether or not you are able to have a life together under these circumstances. You have your reasons for insisting you must allow your abusers access to you and your life, and that is something your fiancee finds unacceptable. That's a fundamental incompability and it needs to be resolved before any more steps can be taken.
But it isn't up to you to convince your fiancee that it's fine to allow your abusers into your lives. (Looking forward, if you have children, what boundaries will you place on the presence of these abusers in their lives? Or any abusers?)
It’s the double standards man, gotta love it lol. She can go on and on about serious topics prior to them meeting about the future but he can’t otherwise it’s a red flag apparently
His phone updated today and idk if there’s a way to see the previous update log.
Sorry to tell you, but you're not going to get past this.
She wants it. She wants it bad enough to ignore your feelings about it and asking if she can contact him. Not to mention, she was already obsessing over him by messaging him daily.
She's going to resent you for saying you wanted it and then back tracking.
If you give in and do it, you'll resent her and not see her as the same person.
The two times in life when people are going to behave the most shitty you will ever see is a new birth or a death.
Yes it is possible to hear a situation of something such as the situation with your cousin, and then as someone close to you, she’s shocked to shit in her own way just because it’s a situation. Yes, it is possible to hear about a bad situation a friend is in and experience ptsd from it.
People are never taught how to deal with deaths or births, so occasionally, it’s the most shitty behavior you are ever going to see from them.
I received some advice at one point: don’t ever judge someone for how they handle death, because part of it is how you’re grieving and strong opinions of what you think people should do, while they are also thinking the same way about others. People process things differently, and if you act out to express judgement, you will always feel shitty about it. Let it go. While yes, I agree melatonin gummies because her dog died is a little dramatic, there’s always a few people who behave dramatic in any situation involving death (or birth). Totally sucks to be around. But it always goes wrong when you try to get on the person for their behavior. Every time.
Women have typically held the emotional labour spots in relationships for a long time, but you’re taking on the load to educate him on racism – which you shouldn’t have to do.
As white people who try to not be racist (as much as we can in a society that inherently benefits white people) it’s our own responsibility to educate ourselves, don’t take it on hon.