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I've been going through the comments looking for this. I can't believe the number of people who think your body belongs to your boyfriend since the first date. How the hell is someone supposed to know they want to be exclusive with someone after the first date? “Oh, I might be interested in seeing this guy again, better forgo sex until I'm sure.” It's ridiculous.
He's entitled to his feelings, but he's not entitled to “punishing” you for his feelings.
This is the crux: he is treating you badly for exercising your sexual agency. That's not someone who is going to respect you long term. If he can't get over it, you need to break up with him.
“last” could mean either way that’s why i asked.
either way my advice is the same.
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Was the 1st time around not bad enough?
So, are you sure she “doesn’t want the responsibilities”? You aren’t actually there atm. It sounds to me like she wants and needs to vent. That doesn’t mean she actually hates the puppy or isn’t caring for it. Sometimes people just need or want to vent. Also, is she yelling as she vents, or is it exasperation or does she giggle a bit, as she says it, showing that yes, she’s complaining, but it’s not that bad? Does she also tell you cute and fun/funny things about the puppy and you are just focusing on the bad stuff because you don’t actually want a dog?
I don’t know, but I want to hear her side of all this and how she truly feels about the dog before getting on the “rehome the puppy” bandwagon….
I think you need to have a serious discussion with her before you think of taking any action. Also keep in mind that you gave her the dog and it is now hers. So you should talk to her before taking any action anyway.
She's probably been thinking of her 10 year relationship and worrying that she's rushed into something so quickly.
Don't push the issue, and don't chase her. Don't be rude, but give her some space to think and see if she wants to commit to anything with you.
Christmas is a time you can slow down and evaluate what has changed since last year, and she's been through a major change.
Might be salvagable, but you're going to have to step back in my opinion.
You apparently don’t know how to read because she said “we met when I was 18” in the post.
Making people in our present pay for people in our past equals no future, you have untreated trauma which is causing you to be clingy if you think somone is upset, see a therapist, untreated trauma makes all who have it. You said he has a rough background be should see a therapist as well.
Now I don't know his perspective but my guess would be he might have wanted to get clean for fun time and felt you asking him might have been an accusation of him doing something wrong. I'm not saying that's your intent, I'm not saying he 100% felt like that, it's only a possibiliy. Also I think the staredown thing is a bad idea.
You should talk to a lawyer, not Reddit
middle name?
Yeah don't get involved into any more drama and messes in your life.
His body, his choice ….
I’m not sure if the police can help. Unless you have proof of sextortion or threats of revenge porn, this is just an affair turned sour.
Think of the worst case scenario, manage the conversation with people you care about and call his bluff. Tell him he can do whatever he wants with the sextape because you’re over it.
Of course you’re risking a bit of a scandal but I’d say it’s much better than let yourself be blackmailed indefinitely.
You came out of unstable relationship. You need stability. He’s unstably naked abs cold.
So the answer is to choose someone stable. Not him. He can’t give you what you seek.
Incredibly disgusting thing to do. His excuse of “it's for a friend” is obviously bs, but the fact that this is the excuse he found makes me think it's still a regular thing he a his friends do.
If I were you I'd ask if he actually sent nudes of you.