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Happy birthday from an Nj girl ?❤️
Move on. She's dating someone and said she isn't going to date you. Don't wait around on someone who isn't fully interested in you.
There is a simple DNA test that can answer the paternity question. Eye color is a dumb idea as a point of reference.
As for the suspicion of cheating, that is more of the presenting issue is not the problem. Probably what y'all need to be looking into, before the whole paternity issue.
I think the solution is therapy like you mentioned was needed in your post. It’s not just about communicating correctly, but disagreeing correctly as well.
ADHD is not an excuse. If he's not taking meds, that's on him.
You are in pain, and he's pestering, and pestering for sex – this is not cool.
he's THIRTY years old. He knows better – but he hopes you don't.
Honestly, I have dogs and cats. They're all my babies. And if one of my dogs killed one of my cats, it wouldn't be in my house anymore. And that's coming from someone who loves all my pets like they're my children
I know a guy who knows a guy who left to another country for a girl who dumped him after two months and he became homeless. He had to beg and take the worst jobs just to be able to return home.
She stated that she did not do that because she was afraid it would annoy him. She can't seem to do anything without feeling for a trip wire first. That speaks volumes about what her situation is like.
Calling mom to get a read on dad before moving forward is a trauma response. If she were 16 (like a bunch of assholes are telling her she's acting like), it would be semi normal. But she's 24 and still walking on eggshells, trying to figure out how to disarm his anger.
Ffs her electricity in her room switched off, and her first thought isn't, “Oh, I must have tripped the breaker.” It was, “Dad turned off my electricity.” So he's done shit like this before, and she even mentions this is a pattern of behavior for him.
She's paying rent, handles all her own personal bills, and still offers to cover groceries. He keeps mentioning that if she didn't spend her money. But if she works minimum wage, it's looking like the majority of her income is going to him.
She rarely asks her parents for rides and takes public transport when she can. So she IS handling her own transportation. But as any adult would know, sometimes shit falls through, and you gotta work around it.
Everyone is stuck on the “You're 24! You should already be out on your own and are a burden because you… pull your weight when other options aren't feasible? Because she didn't try to leave and crash and burn thanks to inflation and covid?
All the others said, “Well, I did it, so it's possible.” Yeah, you managed it in completely different circumstances. That's great for you it really is. But stop trying to act like everyone else's situation is comparable to yours.
Op is not a burden, nor is she a failure to launch. Also, there are so many people who go their whole lives without a driver's license. It's not the end all be all. I really don't understand why so many people are furthering/ ignoring the fathers abusive behavior. She's NOT acting like a teenager. She's acting like an adult child dealing with an emotionally and mentally abusive parent.
Mentally healthy parents don't turn off their adult daughters' electric when she's paying for rent and food and covering her own bills. Especially not just to prove a point, because she asked about his emotional state. And we don't know if she's been dealing with sabotage or not. So it could very well be her father's fault she's still living there.
You don't go into a vasectomy thinking I can come back later and reverse it. It's supposed to be permanent. And reversals are not cheap and you have to pay out of pocket. And while I agree that vasectomy it very easy if the OP is not ready to give up the potential of having more kids he shouldn't do it. If he tells the surgeon that he has doubts they won't do it anyway. Their relationship is not stable so I understand that he doesn't want to do this right now. If she's 100% certain she never wants kids again and he isn't then it make sense that she gets her tubes tied. And yes the burden is almost always put on the woman. And while it seems unfair she's the one that would suffer the consequences the most. As a woman I would never put my fertility in the hands of a guy unless he was fixed (and again that should only be done if he is 100% sure). They really don't sound like they're ready to try and make this relationship work. I have a feeling this isn't the only issue they're having
Info: how did you come across her texts?
This honestly feels like a lifetime original series
I know one thing. Your relationship is as good as over. Better give it the ol' yeller treatment and move on.