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Sorry that happened to you, but glad to hear you're in a better place, you're awesome for getting through it. Some parents really don't and the worst part is a lot of it that damage their children is just a regular thursday they won't think about. My parents are Jehovas witnesses and that should probably say it all.
Goddess you sound like me and my husband only across the sea. I'm disabled. Money is tight. I offered to get a job. He said no but then offered to get a second job. I said no because I would never see him. Know what finally made us both happy? I apply for work from home jobs. Is that a viable compromise for the two of you? She mentions her eyes specifically so I'm unsure of her capabilities but even so, even something as simple as taking a morning shift as a barrista at a coffee house 2 days a week. She probably also feels lonely cooped up in the house all day. I'm not sure what her hobbies are but with winter here anything outdoors that is free would be naked to do. And if she suffers from S.A.D.D. like a lot of people do this time of year will make it worse. Sit down with her and apologize about making her feel isolated. It wasn't your intention. And ask her what kind of job she would be interested in that she feels she could manage. And just listen. Don't offer your opinion. Don't show doubt. And then tell her okay. And ask if she wants you to help her look. If she says yes, go for it. If she tells you no. Then tell her you love her and end the conversation there. If she really wants the job she'll find one. Otherwise all her bitching is just that, bitching due to any of the other mental/physical issues she may suffer from. Especially if her disability causes chronic pain. I online with chronic pain and on the days when my disability flares and the medications don't work very well I am like your wife. I can be a bear. But days, like today, where I am pain free I am in SUCH a good mood. I laugh and joke. Things that would normally annoy me just don't bother me. Picture an enlightened monk and the serene looks on their faces and that's how I feel when I'm not in pain.
Why would forcing you to do something you don’t want to save your marriage?
Tell him he needs a boob reduction to save the marriage.
Just as ridiculous.
Seems like she’s already a single parent now. To a newborn and a man child. How awfully exhausting. The husband doesn’t seem to be interested in being a parent or a spouse.
It has gone to all his children. He has none with you from what I gather.
If I knew that it would turn out this way, I probably wouldn't not fall in love with him. But it is what it is. You see I survived a lot during my early days and this led me to grow up very fast. Now when I look at people my age, I see nothing that interests me.
I forgot to mention in the post that we also have a trip coming up which is non refundable and I don’t know how I’ll spend a whole weekend with him feeling like this.
You forcing a decision in the span of a month was a bit of a sabotage.
She's probably still reeling with, grieving, and processing the news of your disease and the mortality of the man she loves, in addition to thinking what it means for her future if you stay together (children, caregiving, etc) and the pressures of her family. This is not a decision she needs to make in a month.
It would probably be beneficial for you both to attend a visit with your genetic counsel together. You also probably need some time to evaluate whether your desire to have this decision made right now is also coming from a grieving, self-pitying, and reactive place where you hope to push her away, or if you can see the ~20-30 good years you may be able to have together as well.
20+ years is a long time, and there may be medical advances, or (not to be too morbid) death with dignity options that may be accessible to you if the focus is on that inexorable end-of-life stage.
Not only that, but drunk people and people on drugs … someone would probably try to take advantage of her.
Course, just stay busy for now.
Our greatest fears lie in anticipation.
Then effing read your title. You work in healthcare then you should be able to understand on women who gave birth. Or are you too busy with someone else's care you just judge your wife on by what you see?
This post reeks of me, me, me and what I think. Did you even ask your wife? If you encouraged her clearly your ways is not working.
I really hope it works but I have a STRONG suspicion that it won't, because what he's really upset about is that you have independence away from him for a weekend monthly. He'd prefer for you to not have that.
When your wife lead bible study, did she skim over the “thou shall not commit adultery” portion of the testament?