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I think gifts should be personalized. IMO, I don’t want what’s flashy or expensive, I want something that shows me you know me. So him getting you jewelry that’s not your style (and do you even wear jewelry?) would probably upset me too, especially for a piece that costs over a grand. I understand why he’s upset, but it seems y’all have some more talking to do.
I risk losing someone I deeply love.
Really?
He’ll have these moments of sincerity and vulnerability and than ruin it by being a massive cunt.
Doesn't sound like you “deeply love” this guy.
He's got a full course load. You're literally sitting around doing nothing. Maybe adjust your expectations?
He just had a bitch fit. That this is all he can offer to me. And that his sleep schedule is fucked up. And that I’m asking for too much. I start fights. He’s not good enough. My expectations are too high. It’s always his fault, I always start the fights etc.
You're driving this poor guy crazy. You should leave him alone for both y'all's benefit.
I agree with everything you said. If she was triggered and it’s too far gone, he needs to move on. It’s unfortunate but what I’m here to say is that bodily protection should not be discouraged.
Whether or not she can see it because of her trauma, he potentially saved her life. And that should never be discouraged. I take that seriously- life and death is more important than protecting emotions.
If men are reading this and worried about it, I would say get some training so that you can learn how to fight without the blindness. His natural reflexes took over and he was successful. But in a blind rage like this, you can end up hurting yourself. Being prepared can only help the situation!
And as women I feel like we should encourage that protection mode. It’s healthy masculinity.
That might work, but why bother? This is the equivalent of a woman telling her overbearing partner “yes, dear”.
We’ve lived together for a short while before, this is the issue. The issue is trying to find a way to see each other more, and not being constantly working to then be able to afford to see each other. If we were to rent it get a mortgage, he is worrying that that it would be the same in terms of constantly paying the rent/mortgage and bills, fuel, food and all of the other essentials to online, and nothing will then be left for luxuries for each other to then enjoy our lives together. He’s mentioned that he like a town near me and would love to move down, however it’s the money issue again. He doesn’t want to be constantly stressed about money and not be able to afford the odd treat and things to do together.
Obviously, taken in context, I would assume 1) it is directly affecting their finances and/or 2) is indicative of some level of immaturity or irresponsibility.
If it wasn't an issue, there would have been no reason to bring it up
My parents still consider my cheating ex as 'one of their own kids' and say he's always welcome at their house. I had a nervous breakdown when our marriage broke up. I was a mess for months, but as long as they see him as one of their own kids, then it's fine. I just don't have to be there for it because I've moved away. I'm happy now and it's low contact all the way.