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I’m not saying there’s no shitty side to porn, there’s a lot of harm done to many of the women seen “starring” in it as well as the fact that there can be a lasting impact on its users.
Additionally, he said he wouldn’t and did, which is poor on his part. If he didn’t think he could give it up, he shouldn’t have said he would. And I’m not necessarily saying it’s unreasonable of her to want him not to use porn, but that she ought to manage her expectations because for the majority of men this is a flat “no”.
However, that’s not what I came here to debate, and I was simply weighing in on the difference between boundaries and rules.
I think that when you truly love someone, they simply become that attractive to you. I've dated people who I found incredibly attractive when I was with them but in the future, after we separated and the feelings subsided, I didn't find them attractive anymore.
It may be a stretch but I feel like if he doesn't view OP like that, he probably doesn't love her like he may have claimed.
Nah he's not gay. He might be bi or pan tho
He's trying to coerce you into swx with his shit attitude.
You don't owe him sex, and the more he behaves this way, the more turned off by him you will be.
Sexual coersion is abuse, and you deserve better. I'm sorry for what you are going through with your mom. Someone who loves you would not be actively working to make this time even worse for you. He would care about what YOU need right now.
Exactly!
In the words of the great cinematic masterpiece Anchorman…
They’ve done studies you know. 60 percent of the time it works every time.
???
Understand that giving up this baby is the best thing for everyone involved. You already missed the first opportunity, and the foster system is terrible, but you can try to find an agency that will do a one to one adoption, where the baby goes straight to the couple who will adopt them. Not sure how easy that is, but also you need to realize you won't be able to give this baby or yourself good life at all. The father seems very apprehensive and may relinquish his parental rights, and therefore would not have to pay you child support. There's no point in talking about what you should have done if it is too late. But you will put your and the baby's life on a horrible trajectory if you decide you're going to have and raise this baby alone.
50m, widower, wife died 6 years ago after a really long battle with breast cancer. We did everything right, but in the end I was overwhelmed with the feeling that even though I did everything I could it still wasn't enough. She got sick just a few years after we got married, my son was only 2 at the time. The both of us struggled with the thought of lost hopes and dreams, it is not an easy load to carry. I had to accept that if given the choice she would not have gotten sick, but our bodies arent controllable like that.
In a moment of humanity, there were times I felt the same as you do now, it's called caregiver fatigue, and it's real. You've got to start to find ways you can blow off some steam, reach out to her family and friends if you can to see if they can help relieve the pressure. When my wife was really sick I found a long walk by myself often helped me get back in the headspace I needed to best support her. You'll have to look out for even mundane things you can do to relieve that stress.
Also would like to suggest you start to see a psychiatrist, and consider an antidepressant if they think its a good idea. Ditto for your wife, it sounds like she is dealing with a lot of anxiety herself. I found talking to my family doctor about it he would just write a script for medication, but a psychiatrist would write a script AND work with me on developing tools to cope with the stresses I was feeling.
You're not alone here, reach out for help for yourself. If you aren't operating at 100% theres no way you will be able to give her the support she needs.
You love someone with all your heart after a year? I must be broken or something
Okay! That's very helpful. Thank you!
Tread lightly, if your ex is a cop, there are some things that he may be able to get away with sue to his connections being a cop
The best birthday gift to yourself would be to break up with that AH!
Look in the mirror and slap yourself naked and then ask the question. Who do you think is best person to spend the rest of your life with,
I think you are just having a crush on this new woman,
thanks, i'll definitely scroll through there. again, i'm not judging. i know people who cheat aren't always bad people or serial cheaters. this is just different from the man I knew very well.