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Damn the way you judged your girl was kind of harsh(?) but i understand as if everyone has its own preferences on looking for someone. Best thing you can do, is to just break up. I dont see any reason to be afraid, you just have to be honest and tell her that its better to cut things off.
Weponized Incompetence. He's making it harder than it needs to be, and making it your problem, so you say “eff it” and do it yourself.
This. OP is down in the dumps feeling like shit (understandably so) and is blaming himself for this. But the way I read it is his GF was just focused on this other guy and wasn’t paying attention to OP or, worse, didn’t care.
I can’t imagine having a threesome with my girl and not having the majority of my focus being on her and her comfort. These two just had sex and forgot all about him. Why would he be expected to come back from that?
You dump him. You can’t stay with somebody that does not respect your no.
People who “can't” control their anger are bad relationship bets.
She in a messed up way could have set you up with a friend. Seeing that she wanted to help you grow up. I have seen this in two sisters. The oldr one introduced the young one to porn, drugs etc. it was too early and messed the young one up. You don't feel good around her, thats ok. Don't overthink the other stuff if she has never done anything else.
Yep, that’s a fair point. I guess my post was in response to those that call age gap relationships gross, grooming and inappropriate without knowing the story – was not really directed at you…
While most people do use their real names, I have several friends who use a different last name on Facebook for privacy purposes (from general public, not people they actually know). Their careers mean they'd like to make sure no one who they don't want seeing their posts will be able to easily find and friend them.
Amusing anecdote: one such friend was running in an election in a local community organization. I wanted to vote for him, so I wrote his name as I knew it on Facebook on the pieces of paper we were using for a secret ballot. I checked in with him first to ask if I had his name right because it didn't feel like the one he said during his candidate speech. With a laugh, he let me know his actual last name that I should write on the ballot.
I’ll look into it, thanks. From what you know, Is this a bandaid solution? (will he just gain all the weight back without a lifestyle change?)
Or is it actually effective long-term?
I loved the part you gave me a solution, excuse me.
You seem to misunderstand this. Except from him going bonkers once in a while, not being able sleep for a while from thinking, there is nothing going bad. I made sure that its a healthy relationship. Im not sure what he is relapsing into but I guess its about the girl before me that hurt him.
I am asking for an advice on how he can solve this, to suggest him to try. Maybe this will work out somehow, and I need not fret but I am not someone that would leave my loved ones alone at the first sign of distress. So we are both trying to do what we can before calling it quits.
I married a girl like that.
We moved a few hours away so I thought it would improve things. It made them worse.
Every other weekend, we drove to see them for the entire weekend. Every vacation we spent with them. Every night she was on the phone with them. Every decision was run past them.
It sucked. Not as bad as her cheating on me and leaving, and abusing me on the way out… but it would have split us up anyway.
My advice is to get out of that situation. She’s almost 30, still totally emotionally and financially dependant, and I doubt it’s going to end any time soon.
I married a girl like that.
We moved a few hours away so I thought it would improve things. It made them worse.
Every other weekend, we drove to see them for the entire weekend. Every vacation we spent with them. Every night she was on the phone with them. Every decision was run past them.
It sucked. Not as bad as her cheating on me and leaving, and abusing me on the way out… but it would have split us up anyway.
My advice is to get out of that situation. She’s almost 30, still totally emotionally and financially dependant, and I doubt it’s going to end any time soon.