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Well yeah firstly I'm not very good at writing and English isn't my first language either? but as i commented a second ago he needs validation every time he says something or he doesn't feel loved. just few days ago he got so insulted he just left coz i didn't hear him and ignored it by accident. So ig that's really my issue coz he been ignoring me for months but i can't do the same to him
DROP THE ROPE. He is not the one. Go on-line your life. You are so young. If I stayed for the one I thought I wanted/needed/deserved at 26, Iād have been miserable and divorced very quickly. So many things he tried to change about me after 2 years that seemed normal when youāre in love but it wasnāt healthy, it was toxic. I wasnāt perfect but he was, just ask him. The guy cheated on me while I had to get medical help for a missed MC and then told me about it after he shared the news why he hadnāt been sleeping with me again was becoming he contracted an STI. I should have busted his nose and walked away but I let his mistake be okay because he was so traumatized about what happened with us. It was all his narcissistic garbage to get me believe that his mistakes are always allowed and fixable. We stayed together another year and a half. It was so unhappy. He didnāt want to talk about being closer together unless it was on his terms. I was willing to accommodate his schedule and work, but him never for me, but he wanted me there at his beck and call. He would dangle a ring like a carrot and Iād chase it. āAs soon as you do Xā was constant. I felt terrible about myself. Finally one day I woke up after another new year spent what he wanted to do and not anything remotely close to what weād talked about and I had agreed to, with cuts all over my feet from my heels, I started gathering courage to end it. And I did a short time later. I waited til he was at work, I collected all of my things from his place, brought his from mine, left my key and locked the door and left a note to never call me again. He knew what heād done, he didnāt need a break up call or conversation, he hasnāt earned it, he hadnāt treated me equally or with dignity and respect. He banged on my door for an hour that night and I didnāt answer. He came again the next day and the next. Like a dog begging for attention I knew when I didnāt give in, heād go find someone else whoād take his bait. A few weeks later, a friend told me she saw him about with a new girl. Shortly discovered she had a child which is shocking considering his behavior with me at the time. They eventually married within 6 months and had 3 kids. I guarantee you that woman has no say in their finances, he controls everything and sheās not allowed to work even if she wanted to.
I didnāt meet my now husband til I was 31, we didnāt start dating til I was 32. We didnāt marry until last year , I at 35, he 36, you have time. So much time. Wait for relationship that will move mountains for you.
What the actually fuck WHY ARE YOU STILL IN THIS RELATIONSHIP???
No, I havenāt spoken to her about it and she doesnāt know Iām a virgin. I donāt want to feel any more shame
Yeah, it is an unspoken rule. And if she knew and told you about it, too, sounds like she intended to sleep with him. Just drop the fwb or drop the friend. Up to you really. Honestly I'd probably drop both at this point. She may show signs of doing something similar in the future.
This. In a truly healthy relationship two people choose each other for who they are, right now. We accept each other, warts and all. There is no justification for being controlling and critical. Inflexibility is a deal breaker.
It is really naked to talk about these types of problems when they arise, but it is essential to talk through it. Ive been in this situation and I know how frustrating it can be. Its taken many conversations over many years to find things that work for us and keep us both happy and satisfied.
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Maybe both guys don't deserve your amazing humor and grace.
Hello /u/H3CTICZ,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
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Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
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Be careful with “yes means yes.” I have seen/heard that be used as an argument against someone being allowed to revoke consent once given. I have also seen/heard of someone being badgered, manipulated or pressured into a reluctant “yes” when they truly did NOT want whatever it was to happen.
If I am at a function with my partner and one of us wants to leave, we leave. No questions asked. There may be something going on that can be discussed after we leave.
Bro code is bullshit, and the people who talk about it the most are always the first to break it. You don't own another person. You do not have a right to them. If you like a girl and want to be with her, then make it official, otherwise you're just an asshole standing in everyone else's way, trying to claim rights you don't have, like a child.
OP is absolutely in the right, and if him and this girl are happy together then they should be together. If the friend is upset by this, then oh well.
Simple: One of them is lying, and it's not the one with timestamped evidence.
You deserve better than the games he's playing.
You simply have to directly tell him what you want or need. Thatās literally the only solution. Heās not a mind reader and Iām sure if heās a decent guy he wants to please you as much as you want to please him. Just tell him what you want.
I wouldnāt call you the ābad guyā necessarily but you are being very judgmental of your friend.
Your values may have changed but herās havenāt. If she is being safe and proud of how many guys sheās slept with – Itās her business.
Why is it annoying to you when you admitted you were doing similar things not too long ago?
Itās interesting that when your friend said āshe kept touching meā your initial reaction was āi donāt care sheās touching everyoneā ā¦ did you make sure he wasnāt uncomfortable? If it was a mutual thing between them – itās between them. Do you have feelings for your guy best friend? Is that why you were annoyed in that moment?
Based on this post – you are judging your friendās choices – lean into that and think about why it bothers you so much?
When it comes to her touching your friends – I would a million percent approach her about that. Itās her business when itās randoms but when it comes to your friends – I would feel uncomfortable with her acting like that (especially if that wasnāt the vibe of the party). I get that she is in her hook up era and thatās totally fine but gotta make sure itās all mutual and everyone is comfortable.
I got broken up with, but I think itās gonna be ok. I know Iāve not been the best lately and maybe if were meant for eachother, this is what we need for now and we will find our way back to eachother
Do.Not.Ask.Your.Husband! Heās going to deny deny deny
If I were you I would hire a PI
I don't think there is anything wrong with being insecure, it's the way he deals with it that sounds concerning. I know I ain't a 10/10 but I'm comfortable in my own body to not go around insulting people because they wear nicer clothes
You do nothing except of being there for him / them when they come to you for help. There is not much more you can do.
You can occassionally ask if they need anything but that's about it. They have to learn their lesson for themselves as nude as that may be.
Trust your gut. This guy doesnāt value you.
This can be changed in settings ??
What are you doing with this friend that is making your partner feel insecure? You didnāt talk about that and context is important.
Wrong. Stop spelling out other peoples points for them, if you didn't get them.
P
Once a partner physically abuses the other ; it's over tbh