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Alice & Lika & Chelsea, 23 y.o.
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Okay, how about we agree that competing for a cats attention is… overwhelming and something that you need to work on.
A persons love for their pet, should be something you appreciate, not resent. There is room for the two of you to exist in his life.
Most details about your post is irrelevant. I'll list the ones to talk about:
I get post-sex blues but after we're done, most of the time he'll immediately go and check on Cat to make sure he doesn't feel unloved.
Bring this up to him. I know it may sound hard to do, but don't try and make it about the cat. Instead, try and make about how you would love to have his comfort after sex. Focus on your side and why you would like him to stay, rather than the reasons he leaves.
This one as well:
I'm having a bad day and I'm telling him about it but he wants to talk about why his cat is angry with him for being at work all day or things like that.
Same thing as above. Don't make it about the cat. Make it about you. Talk about how you don't feel like he genuinely listens to or cares when you have a bad day. You want a partner who can be empathetic/supportive during your bumpy times.
First thing first, it looks like you don't have the right info, when it comes to your options.
First getting married does not automatically allow her to stay, the two of you will have to file for an “Adjustment of Status” with the USCIS and it would need to be approved before she can stay. Long gone are the days of getting married = getting a green card.
Hopefully, your girlfriend has not been in trouble with the law and has never overstayed any Visa she may have had in the past, because either can cause huge problems when it comes to being processed through the immigration wickets.
Getting married first also means that you would have to undo that if things go poorly and the “Adjustment of Status” is denied.
Yes, in most cases, you can appeal and/or get waivers, but those take time and effort.
Option #2 in my view is better, which is for her to go back and then to apply for a K-1 Fiancée visa, and once that's approved for her to come back to the USA, and for the two of you to get married, then go through the wickets to get her a Green Card.
Again, if she has any issues with the law or any stays, it can/will slow things down, while things are being addressed, and if you go this route and things don't go well, don't try to have her come on an “tourist visa” then get married, because that will add more problems to any that already exists, because a “tourist visa” or “Visa Waiver” is basically a promise to go home before the visa expires. Getting married and then applying for an “Adjustment of Status” means that one of both of you have lied to the USCIS by breaking the promise, that allowed for the visa to be issued in the first place.
What the two of you should do will depend on your exact situation and your desires.
Just do keep in mind that getting married does not equal being able to stay, and in some cased being married and being apart, especially if there are factors that make it nude for her to be able to clear the immigration wickets, could result in the two of you being in different countries.
Go and do your research on K-1 (fiancée) and K-3 (spouse) visas, please use reputable sites and don't forget to at a minimum bounce what you find against the information that's on the USCIS site.
The applications are something that you can do on your own if you are able to follow instructions and pay attention to details. It can be a bit of a pain to gather all the necessary documents, but it's not rocket science.
If you do decide to use a Immigration Service, be sure to check all/any documents to make sure that they are accurate and that the information presented is correct. And do make sure that you get copies of any thing that is sent to the Embassy/Consulate/USCIS, because you will need to provide the same information to them everytime you fill out forms/applications in the future, because anything that is different, will tend to result in the USCIS asking questions and/or clarification, and if the info provided earlier turns out to be wrong/false, the two of you will be the one's who end up paying for it, not the people/company that submitted paperwork on your behalf.
Disclaimer, I am not a legal or immigration professional, so take everything I said with a grain of salt, don't take anything said here as face, go and and check everything out for yourself.
It sounds like the two of you are serious, so I think it would be best for the two of you to go and first get information/facts on what your options are, and once that's done, use that info to make a plan that works best for the two of you.
Different countries have different processing times, when it comes to K-1 and K-3 visas, with countries with many people trying to come and countries with high levels of visa fraud, taking the longest. I don't know how things are in Hungary, I think that you can find processing times either on the USCIS or maybe it was the Embassy/Consulate site for the country she is going to apply in, which in this cause would be Hungary. K visas have to be applied for outside of the US.
I hope this made sense and was helpful.
Best wishes and good luck going forward!