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Divorce her
I had to scroll for pages to find this comment! I agree with you on your comments. That 21 year age difference speaks volumes for her dad and his wife. You're right that neither of them has a level of maturity that matches their ages. Ugh.
The whole thing stinks of immaturity, inconsideration, and purely assinine levels of selfishness. Smh. OP's father carries the most blame here. He should be standing up for his daughter that's here already and he's just not doing that. He seems to want the chance to have a fantasy do-over since he's allowing the same name to be given to his new baby without a fight. Really makes me shudder to think that they believe this is even remotely okay to do.
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Communicate with your partner about your feelings. Come up with a plan so that both of you are on the same page.
I bet this guy truly loves you.Don’t try to ruin a good thing because of feelings.
Yep – and I think you have the wrong therapist.
You need to find someone who specializes in CBT and will expect you to do the work rather than sitting around thinking about yourself and rationalizing your choices even more than before.
My son’s mother passed away seven years ago I also have money saved up for him because at the time I didn’t think I’d be married again
OP I'm sorry this is happening but I have to disagree with the majority. Your immediate reaction is based on emotion, totally normal. However there are so many reasons I'd look into this further before even MENTIONING this to him. Maybe he's the one who rejected her and she's trying to ruin his life, maybe she's unhinged and seeking attention even though she “doesn't want any drama” going forward. If she's been scared for so long why not tell her husband? If you're scared enough you don't really think about drama. There are so many ways to fake messages and emails and date and time stamps. Obviously I'm not saying he's innocent, I'm just saying to do your homework, do your investigation, look at the dates and times on some things she sent you to see if any jump out at you like “that's the weekend I was away with friends so it's plausible” or “wait he was with me at the movies (or wherever) at this time and definitely wasn't using his phone at 3:57pm because I remember we were holding hands during the opening scene”. If he's guilty, you'll find out and take the necessary steps. But if he's not, and you accuse him of this, there's no coming back from it…marriage is over. Take your time, unless you feel scared, and find what you need to find before you ma!e ANY moves. Good luck.
There’s actually no rules about fake stories
Break up!
This is the only “adult” relationship you've ever been in, and you've been in it all the way through high school. You have nothing to compare it to in order to decide whether this is the best long-term relationship with you.
Date casually for the next year or so while you grieve this relationship. Give it at least a year before you get serious with someone again. Make sure you understand what is/isn't a deal-breaker for you, what your boundaries are, and how you will enforce those boundaries.
Go enjoy your life and find out WHO YOU ARE without a long-term boyfriend!
Do you want security? Thoughtfulness ? Care? Or casual sex ?
thank you so much i will definetely try to do this, thanks for your positive message and your good vibes
Extremely cute update. Good on you.
I would do the same thing & Im glad you did! Finally a redditor with common sense & self-respect & doesn’t make excuses for the person they’re dating (those make me so annoyed lol)