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First of all you need to tell him so he can be treated, secondly you need to break up with him as your clearly not compatible, thirdly you need to discuss what you have done to make him wonder usually there is an underlying issue which you need to be aware off so you can fix it. Lastly spend some time working on yourself before getting back in the arena
I need to attene a whole week theoretical course to take driving test i am from turkey and it gonna be expensive in 2023 so thats why my parents rushing things. And yes she said she'll break up with me
Male. I slept with 3 women before I got married and I regret 2 of them.
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No she doesn’t expect me to go to mosque or any of the stuff you listed. She doesn’t even do most of the things you listed. It’s more for a social thing for her family, we would have a traditional Muslim wedding
Why would she need an excuse?! It's her body, her phone, her life.
I find it very weird that they're still focused on her. Yes, she broke up with my boyfriend after she cheated on him.
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This made me wheeeeeezzze
PE can be psychological. Has OP tried any sort of therapy with their wife?
When I was in my early 20s I dated a man who struggled with PE. We were young and the Internet was in its infancy, I had no one to talk to about it. I never said a word about it, but thought to myself “this won’t do, how do I help him out?”. I didn’t want to point it out and make him feel badly about it because we were young and I was only his 2nd partner and I knew he felt terribly nervous.
If you don’t want to hear how I fixed it, stop reading now. What I did was: I got into the habit of edging him. It’s give him extended BJs in which I’d back off every time he got close. Somehow I eased him out of his tendency without him even knowing I was doing it. When we broke up 3 years later it was no longer something he suffered from it in any sexual situation. I hope he was able to take that into his next relationship. Years later I’ve read about using the same technique described to help ease PE in a book on sexual satisfaction. I think Passionista or another book by that author.
I feel for OP. It sounds like his wife loves him, but isn’t comfortable talking about this. If improvement is wanted )and this isn’t some sort of medical issue) communication is the missing piece. It’s not like it scared her away before she married, it won’t scare her away now.
My advice to OP is to not let her off the hook. Do not let this issue fester and bubble under the surface, make her talk about it. This is something that should be approached as a team since you are married adults and OP has already started learning and applying knowledge. I think he should have warned her what they were going to be talking about before he jumped in. The reaction seems less mean than uncomfortable. Maybe she was being like me, silent out of fear. This may be something she’s avoided talking about their entire relationship out of worry it would make things worse or make him feel badly AND THEN HE JUST BRINGS IT UP LIKE IT’S NOTHING.
It could be a bit of a mindfuck for her. I’d let this time slide, let her know the subject matter is serious and important, and give her another crack at it. If she refuses to be an adult after that, I’d be extremely concerned. No one wants to be with someone they can’t talk to.
Exactly, keep that attitude and it will do you more good than harm.
Thanks for your response. I know the baby idea is not great at the moment. We weren't hoping a baby would fix things. But I'll be putting a hold on this for a while until this is sorted.
It's just so hot to know what is real / my gut warning me, and what is just my insecurities at play. Most of the time I trust him and I was working through the past betrayals, our relationship was getting stronger but these recent “betrayals” (He insists he hasn't done anything wrong) really throw me.
I hope my psychologist can help me through this.
Thanks again
The dinner is tonight. I'm just wondering if we should wait for the bruising to darken some before getting any makeup. Do you still think it's worth it if my eye is swollen shut by tonight? And what do you think the chances are that I can get the swelling down enough to be able to see by tonight?
Don't do it. People change a Lot in Their 20's. Wait until you're (at least) 27.
Hey man I know. It wasn’t the best decision. She told me what she’d do. I know this was unwise
Anyway any advice on the situation?
nonbinary is a totally different thing than polyamory
Honestly, you said it best. You’re done with his shit. You had some fun, it’s over now. I think he lied more to his girlfriend than you, as you were both in a fwb situation for most of this…but either way he’s a liar. Prepare yourself for him to throw another fit when you go no contact again.
Edit: grammar
Sorry aunt