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This is grisly as hell. You have received some excellent advice about handling this incident correctly, which I hope you follow. Your son’s well-being is the utmost priority here. Police report & therapy.
I will just add this: if your brother has extreme political views that are in fundamental disagreement with who you are, what you believe, and the values you are hoping to instill in your son, you need to check in with him about certain topics. Who knows at this point what type of ideological poison your brother might have shared with him on that Discord server?
So take a small interest in the video games, dad. Even if you don’t like them. Your son likes them for a reason, find out what that is, share in his triumphs and grievances. You need to be that person for him now.
I’m in the same boat… but my issue is we just had a kid 4 months ago, she says she misses us and she needs to work on herself but she’s made it clear that she’s out with Others. I work 20days straight and I’m home 10 days a month, I make great money and the only reason I have the job is to provide for use and reach our goals and future plans. And now I’m left empty and feel like my existence is purely be held together by my son. I still love her and I’m more stuck than I have ever been.
I don't think it was a misunderstanding.
If that was the case, he wouldn't have been so hateful about how your gift just created work for him. He wouldn't have gone on and on about how foolish you were for spending your own money on a gift FOR HIM!
I do not think you are at fault here. I think you should stop saying this was a joint miscommunication, because that is not at all what your post indicates.
He intentionally spoiled your pleasure at giving him your thoughtful gifts. He was a totally unpleasant jerk, griping and criticizing and moaning about it, picking it apart and telling you what a stupid cow you were for wasting your money.
I would have told him I was sorry I used my money and time trying to please him and failing so miserably. Then I would have taken the gifts back to the store and got a refund. And I would be very sure to never buy him another present.
Stop trying to spin this like you were partially at fault. Stop thinking his nastiness was excusable. You are setting yourself up for a repeat performance.
F to your current partner.
first thought is to move the cat food personally… that being said if you two have or ever plan on having kids her habits need to change… any medication taken by a child accidentally can be a VERY bad situation for you all… if she cant see that then she needs to be told so… how does she expect you two to continue and grow a life if she cannot make basic good decisions.
It absolutely doesn’t matter. Stop trying to make excuses and take the blame. The dude is a nutcase for suggesting that.
For the sake of your child, please fully cut contact. Adults are more capable of accepting people coming into and out of our lives. Your 10 yo shouldn’t be subjected to that.
You do not need to, and should not, participate in your exes birthday. He’s clearly walked away at this point, until he tries to yank you back into his life. Please stop being his doormat.
You are clearly more motivated and focused than your ex. He’s almost 30 but lives and acts as if he’s still in the frat house. Please block him on everything. Take time to be with your kiddo. When you’re ready to reenter the dating world, do so slowly and don’t introduce a partner to your daughter for quite some time.
The home is in her name as are all the assets. There is more going on here.
She could keep, certainly. I kept my name when I married. On the plus side, it saves a lot of hassle with the paperwork involved when from legally changing your name.
Thank you for the feedback. Yes I have talked to him about it but also I know his feelings which are he’d have kids now if I wasn’t saying no. He also understands and isn’t pushing at all. I’m just trying not to get ahead of myself.
The right man won’t care about whether you’re a virgin or how many exes you have. If someone is hyper focusing on that when considering you for a relationship they aren’t seeing you in your entirety as a person. The right person will appreciate you wholly and see other aspects of you as more important for compatibility.
Ur first problem is apologizing. U don't owe him an apology. Are you not with a grown man? Does he not have a job? Surely he can set his own alarm for plans that HE made. Ur being a pushover. And he is manipulative. Girl move on.