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No. It doesn't work like that.
When you don't take care of or deal with your mental health, it takes a great toll on your partner. You often share a home, life and dreams together.
Sometimes depression makes you unable to a lot of things, perhaps unable to participate in your relationship, unable to have an income and instead live of your partner. You might not even clean your home or keep up with your personal hygiene.
In the end, your partner will have tried everyting. Paid and cleaned for you, begged you to go to therapy etc. Your partner will feel burned out and start to resent his/her/their life, relationship, situation.
And then resent you for not dealing with your health. Then it is over. Truly over.
This isn’t super uncommon in my experience. I had a boyfriend who would gladly pound away while I was reading/playing on my phone/ or trying to sleep because I was sick, tired or just not in the mood. Was easier to let him to that than listen to his whining or nonstop begging for sex.
I was casually listening to a Pink Floyd song(When The Tigers Broke Free) reading this and the last part struck my heart.
How can a human being be so in denial about its descendance is unforgivable. You're bringing life to this world only to slam the door shut to it instead of embracing your flesh's flesh. Disgusting.
I'm deeply sorry for judging your uncle that quickly, but these sort of events are making fly off the handle…
As for the OP, I'm wishing you the best of luck through this but if your biological kid ever visits you someday, don't close the door.
Mama…The absolute last thing you should be doing right now is jumping into something “casual” right after coming out of an abusive relationship… I get it, you have needs… Buuut, you should be focusing on getting yourself back on track (e.g. financially and mentally/spiritually through therapy) before you even consider jumping into a relationship… You owe it to yourself, but, most importantly, you owe it to that baby girl. Godspeed…
You cheated, roped your husband into taking care of kid that is not his and now you are afraid of consequences.
He also has been making his point that it’s only fair because I didn’t have coverage, along with pointing out any other cosmetic problems it had before crashing that may have contributed to the car breaking as bad as it did.
I've worked in auto insurance a long time for property damage and liability (among other things) in the jurisdiction of almost 50 states and I can confidently say your boyfriend is actively trying to screw you, like you fear.
Let's get this straight, you did have coverage for the accident; you had liability coverage because that is what is paying for the parked car. So, your insurance literally is paying for his stupidity.
You just didn't have Collision coverage, which the vast majority of people do not have for a 30 year-old vehicle because the cost of having it insured for Collision (the first party coverage on your policy that pays for damage to your own vehicle) is not worth it, compared to the value of the vehicle or damage, etc.
OP, if not for threat of the law, he would have left the people who he hit high & dry. He is attempting to do the same thing to you. I am telling you, without a doubt, that he owes you for damaged property. What is the proximate car of your vehicle being damaged? It's not the fact that you did not pay for Collision coverage (which is expected) or that he had permission to drive your vehicle, it's his own lack of attention. This isn't a situation where you handed your keys to someone who was impaired; he assured you that he could take care of the vehicle and he assumed the risk of driving a vehicle without collision coverage.
(One thing to think about is, if he has any auto insurance on his own you could try to make a claim against him to see if your vehicle could be qualified as a non-owned vehicle by the policy-holder under secondary coverage. This is a long shot and he probably doesn't have insurance but it's something to consider.)
Normally, if you have collision coverage the insurance company would take in account the year/make/model of your vehcle, the condition, and try to figure out the cash value. If this were insurance, they likely would not pay you for the $2k of work you put into your vehicle, just that it is a vehicle in very good condition. The price would also be for what it is to have a comparable model (or something like that). It sounds like the cosmetic problems he's whining about are likely surpassed by the work your vehicle had anyway.
I'd take his ass to small claims court because I don't know how much it costs to hire an attorney or how much your vehicle would even be worth. I fully agree with dump & sue.
TL;DR: The fact that you were incredibly stupid in letting anyone borrow your vehicle when you do not have collision insurance and are strapped for funds does NOT mean that he does not owe you. Dump him. Sue him. Hopefully someone on this board actually knows about attorneys, but FOR THE LOVE OF GODT, STOP GIVING HIM THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT (about being naked up for money, so are YOU) and GET YOUR MONEY BACK.