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You… are a horrible mother. I’m not trying to be rude, but as a child of similar abuse, you should have never had kids if your first instinct isn’t to protect them and yes, that means both of them. Because your husband is an abusive individual. What he does to one will ALWAYS affect the other and don’t for a second think it won’t.
bro wym “her personality sucks” have you ever actually talked to her??
Are you sure you're looking for advice? Because most of the comments advise you to leave him and move on. Or are you looking for confirmation on what you've already decided, which is to stay?
The thing is that this pain you're feeling is a part of yourself bleeding. You can either grit your teeth and cauterize the wound or you can try to cover it up and ignore its existence, letting it get infected. That's how I see it, anyway.
Keep in mind that if he does it again (which is a big possibility), you will never forgive yourself for falling for his act .
Best advice in here. OP, you should also remember that there are a ton of crazy people on-line and you shouldn't conflate your experience with anyone else's story.
Quora and even this very thread have tons of people that seem mentally unstable giving advice. You were assaulted and it was inappropriate but don't let anyone on-line convince you that you have to feel terrible. Trying to absorb other people's experiences isn't going to help you.
You are in complete control and while you felt scared you probably also felt mostly confused and didn't say anything because you were trying to be nice. The mother is also confusing you because she's trying to protect her kid from himself. You're allowed to set boundaries with her and with him, you don't have to be nice.
It's also completely okay if you don't want to get the police involved. You have complete control of this situation now and you get to decide what happens. A dumb kid assaulted you but that doesn't mean you're responsible for his problems. You may feel like you were helpless but you were just trying to assess your situation and be nice, HE is helpless now because you have full control.
I'd be so hiring a PI to sit at the table over and tell me what's going on.
It’s okay to call off the wedding.