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Your boyfriend isn't the vitamin D you need. He's your boyfriend, not your be all, end all cure for seasonal depression. It's your responsibility to take care of yourself and make the adjustments you need to feel whole and complete within yourself. You need to get out and make friends, pursue some hobbies and whatnot, instead of pushing the responsibility of your well-being on this guy.
Cold, long, and dark winters aren't to blame. Alaska isn't the problem. Your boyfriend isn't at fault. You're the one digging your heels in when things don't go exactly your way, you're refusing to compromise, dismiss his wishes and don't care about his needs, and this behaviour would drive anyone away. Weaponizing your emotions against him when your wishes aren't met is also only going to cause harm.
There's things that could be said about his behaviour, but I'll withhold judgement due to only having your side of the story, and understanding that even the kindest and most caring people can be pushed past their breaking point being treated like this. Like man, if I got cornered and villainized like this just for being tired and wanting to go home I'd ghost your ass too, op.
This is fake, isn't it? In the USA, OP's entire generation of women has surpassed their men, now outnumbering them in college 3 to 2. For this so-called BF to be unaware of this, he'd have to have been raised by the Taliban.
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In terms of sloppiness, she leaves all her belongings out, and anything she uses, she never puts back.
I also forgot to mention that I wake up early to drive her to and from the tube station each morning and evening to help her commute.
With the cats, I find it’s a couple of things, so for like their poop, currently the poor things been having issues where they have messy bums after that require some cleaning, and then since we online in a smallish flat, I have to spend time airing the room out. But there’s also stuff like having to watch them frequently since they jump on to many things they shouldn’t etc or doing things they shouldn’t. I think it boils down to me feeling some fatigue and wanting to ease off on the weekends since I feel overwhelmed on the weekdays trying to balance it with work.
No, they will hate him forever!
OP: I'm sorry that you're in this situation.
I do feel the need to comment because I see in this post, again, people are gassing you up without really appreciating that you are a real human being with a real family. So I'm going to be a bit straight with you.
Firstly – when you married your wife. What were your vows? Did you not take your vows seriously? Did you expect that her father would never get sick, never get ill, never even whisper of being in your lives? If so, that was an unreasonable expectation and you apparently did NOT take your vows as seriously as you should have. Do you want to be the person who takes a vow frivolously and drops it the moment it becomes inconvenient?
Secondly, have you considered the reality what happens if you divorce your wife? You will be a divorcee and the father to two babies with two different baby mommas. You will be tearing your family apart and disrupting the stability BOTH of your sons currently enjoy. You will also have no control over what your youngest son does, or who he sees, during your ex-wifes time. Your child WILL be seeing their grandfather if you divorce your wife. Worst, your youngest son will not even have the benefit of having a stable, loving relationship with his half black brother – and if you divorce your wife and break up your family to protect your first son – you will literally be changing your youngest sons life, for the worst, for your first son, and you'll be doing it directly because your first son is black. Do you want your child to resent black people and resent his older brother? Because that is a very probable reality if you actually end your marriage.
Get individual therapy. You need help. You are spiraling and you need someone who can help you work through what you are feeling. Go to couples counseling and see if a compromise can be arrived at with your wife. Accept that you cannot control everything, and that's OK, because that's not a healthy expectation to have. Make some compromises and keep your marriage, your vows, and your family intact. Or choose not to – but know you will very likely see a far worse outcome as a result of your choice.
All of these posts are asking for advice on relationships. I could’ve worded it a little differently and it would’ve been acceptable. Keep scrolling of you’re not going to answer there’s actual question.
So it's a timing issue. You each haven't had enough time to decompress (to heal) after the last relationships you were in.
I would suggest a breakup with the option of reconnecting later. Maybe 6 or 9 months. It will be important that you have no intentional contact during that time, but after it's over, you can agree to reconnect and test the waters then.
Just be prepared for what this mean. It could turn out that you meet nobody in all that time and when you reconnect, he could be with someone else, or vice versa. In any case, it gives you what you both need (time to get over past relationships), without losing all hope that you will lose each other. But after 6 or 9 months, losing each other won't be so bad. Hopefully.
Gaslighting. Run
When someone Pranks you at work it is not Okay. Not even if it wasn't a triggering act.
You need to report your coworker for playing pranks on coworkers.
“I need you to know that this guy is playing pranks on coworkers. This is a working environment and I shouldn't have to put up with childish bullshit. I'm trying to do my job. I told him to cut it out but his pranks are getting worse instead. Can you get this guy to stop and focus on his job instead? At the very least I want to work on shifts with other staff who care about their job.”
Based on how it goes you can decide whether or not to mention the Triggering behavior.
You didn't start this. A 30 yr old stupid person is behaving like a child in the workplace.
Based on how that